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Successful relationship with bipolar

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I have a bipolar partner and I would be lying if I said it was easy. I love him very much and will never leave him--but it very hard for me to remember that he loves me. I know he does, but it sucks when I can't get my kiss or hug. It sucks when I do the wrong thing--it sucks that at times I feel like I mean nothing to him. I know that that is not true--but even knowing that doesn't make it any easier. Does anybody else feel this way? Have you been in a successful relationship? What do you do to make things better for the both of you?
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replied May 28th, 2009
Experienced User
Is he taking his medication and going to a psychiatrist? I know how difficult it can be to keep people with bipolar disorder on their meds. Or are they just not working the way the used to?

Was he different when you first met him? Were his symptoms more controlled?
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replied May 28th, 2009
He takes his meds as he is supposed too. He sees a doctor on a regular basis. Since he has started Lithium he has not has terrible mood swings of any sort--they are working--it is just these side effects that effect his mood because Lithium messes with his moods (or anyone who takes it for that matter) I feel like I have lost him.
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replied September 29th, 2011
Hello..im totally depressed today bcz. of my husband attitude and when i ws trying to make myself feel better saw this site n read ur msg. we are at the same boat n the worst thing with me..he's my husband not just my BF..we've been togethet for almost 4 yrs. and it seems no matter how much i tried to show how much i care n love him it doesn't help at all, i don't wna have so called broken home tht's why im trying my best to keep things right, unfortunately he's also BIPOLAR ..now i don't know wht to do:(
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replied November 7th, 2009
i have a friend who is the same she has mood swings one minute she is fine the next she is deppressed ,one minute you think you have known her for years the next you dont know her at all, its just one of the symptoms of bi polar,there are new medicines out there that control the mood better tegretol is one,she suffers rapid cycling bipolar so her moods change daily or hourly ,the main thing is try to make sure that the meds are taken.
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replied February 18th, 2010
Problems with my bipolar boyfriend
I've been dating my boyfriend for about 5 months now. He's 18 almost 19. He's told me about his past and warned me that he's "crazy."For alil bit I was jus blinded by my own happiness about how great he is to me and how nice he treats me.. I didn't put it in my head that he is bipolar, that he can be violent when he's angry or say hurtful things with out caring. I didn't know what kind of relationship I was jumping into only cause I was so love struck haha. I always just try and watch what I do for the most part. But people with bipolar are all different I think. Like if there is another male around me and I don�t pay attention to my bf the whole time, he'll snap. Or if someone looks at him wrong or someone talks crap to him, he'll snap. He likes to throw things too, he's told me that he always has. So your arguing or you say something wrong he'll get mad and what ever is in his hand he'll throw it. When he's mad I cant touch him and he wont talk to me. He's taken meds before but doesn't now. He said he hates taking them but he said he can control it alil better now, Which I can tell he's trying to keep it cool and not flip out. We haven't gotten into any bad fights, but thats because I try to let it not get that far you know. My only problem is, is that most of the time he'll get all sorts of mad at me then wont talk, I never really know why he's mad till after I squeeze it out of him. Im really really trying to keep sane and not just say screw it, because I really like this guy and he really likes me (or else he would of just left me when he has one of his episodes). I just want to know if there's any advise or suggestions that you can give me to help me try and get him to calm down when he gets mad at me so that I don't just get tired of him freaking about every lil thing. He only pushes me away or secludes him self when he has his episode, then when he's done he comes back to me or he'll just get mad all over again. Every time he gets mad at me im not going to try and fix the problem or defend my self when all he does is sit there mad. But then I don't want to just sit and wait for him to get un mad and pretend that everything is ok. grrrr Sad
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replied February 19th, 2010
i tried to date a girl with bi polar (rapid cycling)it was very hard to understand where she was coming from,i had to sleep out of arms reach of her, couldnt hug her ,had to put up with hourly changes of mood and not being able to hug her or cuddle up in bed , so i got shut , so my advice is go out with someone normal and think of your own life . because its the best thing i ever did,dont put up with it get rid .
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replied September 20th, 2011
Help don't fear
Why would you ever think someone with bi-polar isn't NORMAL? What is normal? I have bi-polar and had a very difficult life. I hate when I have my mood swings. I really hate it and hate when people think there is something wrong with me. No one can control this and even if they say they can, that's only a little bit. I started taking a new medication called Latuda and it is the best thing ever. I have been on so many medications for this and was diagnosed with depression, only for my doctor to realize it had to do with my age (I was 15 when diagnosed with ADD, bi-polar, and depression). The only thing to do, is if you can't handle being with someone that has that and doesn't want to help themselves, don't stay with them. I was in an emotionally abusive relationship with someone who didn't have bi-polar and everytime he did something that bothered me and I would try to communicate with him about it, he told me it's not me talking, it was my bi-polar which wasn't true. Not every feeling or emotion a bi-polar sufferer has is realted to that. Try to see it from your partner or significant other's point of view. Were not happy we have this disorder, but we have it and we have to live with it the best we can. Stop just thinking of yourself and try to understand the person you are with. They are human too! Just with an uncontrollable chemical imbalance in their brain. Help them, don't fear them. Add to their support system and communicate with them the best way to help them through their episodes. That's all I can say from my point of view. I hope this helps anyone who needs it. Encourage the person your with to see a psychiatrist and psychology to work everything out.If they understand they need help, they will be forever thankful. Trust me. I know how it all feels.
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replied September 20th, 2011
Help don't fear
Why would you ever think someone with bi-polar isn't NORMAL? What is normal? I have bi-polar and had a very difficult life. I hate when I have my mood swings. I really hate it and hate when people think there is something wrong with me. No one can control this and even if they say they can, that's only a little bit. I started taking a new medication called Latuda and it is the best thing ever. I have been on so many medications for this and was diagnosed with depression, only for my doctor to realize it had to do with my age (I was 15 when diagnosed with ADD, bi-polar, and depression). The only thing to do, is if you can't handle being with someone that has that and doesn't want to help themselves, don't stay with them. I was in an emotionally abusive relationship with someone who didn't have bi-polar and everytime he did something that bothered me and I would try to communicate with him about it, he told me it's not me talking, it was my bi-polar which wasn't true. Not every feeling or emotion a bi-polar sufferer has is realted to that. Try to see it from your partner or significant other's point of view. Were not happy we have this disorder, but we have it and we have to live with it the best we can. Stop just thinking of yourself and try to understand the person you are with. They are human too! Just with an uncontrollable chemical imbalance in their brain. Help them, don't fear them. Add to their support system and communicate with them the best way to help them through their episodes. That's all I can say from my point of view. I hope this helps anyone who needs it. Encourage the person your with to see a psychiatrist and psychology to work everything out.If they understand they need help, they will be forever thankful. Trust me. I know how it all feels.
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replied April 5th, 2013
BIPOLAR sucks
Unfortunately having a relationship with someone that is bipolar is extremly difficult, nearly impossible. I love my ex-bipolar partner more than anything in this world, however; the uncontrolled mood things, inability to process things corectly, out of control anger, impulsive recklass behavior, lack of follow thru alll led to an instability I could no loger handle. Leaving was the hardest thing I ever had to do, while when she was balanced, she was a beautiful person. But understanding that she could not control her behavior and it would be a lifelong battle for normalcy, yes normalcy, paying the bills, eating, friends, talking, communication, became too much.
I feel horible for her and wish with all of me that people didnt have to deal with bipolar, on the other hand, if you are in a relationship with someone that is bipolar, you have to understand that it is going to be a long difficult life and that you will never truly be able to predict moods or any sort of consistency.
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Users who thank leftlanepassing for this post: CarolineEF 

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replied April 5th, 2013
Community Volunteer
Re: BIPOLAR sucks
leftlanepassing wrote:
Unfortunately having a relationship with someone that is bipolar is extremly difficult, nearly impossible. I love my ex-bipolar partner more than anything in this world, however; the uncontrolled mood things, inability to process things corectly, out of control anger, impulsive recklass behavior, lack of follow thru alll led to an instability I could no loger handle. Leaving was the hardest thing I ever had to do, while when she was balanced, she was a beautiful person. But understanding that she could not control her behavior and it would be a lifelong battle for normalcy, yes normalcy, paying the bills, eating, friends, talking, communication, became too much.
I feel horible for her and wish with all of me that people didnt have to deal with bipolar, on the other hand, if you are in a relationship with someone that is bipolar, you have to understand that it is going to be a long difficult life and that you will never truly be able to predict moods or any sort of consistency.


These are such true words...Especially "Leaving was the hardest thing I ever had to do"......

This happening just about killed me...It was and still is rough...My best to all who have walked this walk in life...You learn a new kind of pain in life....and you find out that your heart can really hurt....Take care...

Caroline...
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