well i should start by apologising for how long this is probably going to turn out. i'm 20 weeks pregnant with my first child and have split with the father. We were on the verge of breaking before i found out i was expecting and obviously tried to make it work once i found out. However, the arguments got worse, he didn't understand what changes were happening and was always moaning about me feeling ill or being tired. It got to the point where we slept seperately and avoided each other as when we were in the same room the atmosphere was unbearable. I decided that i didnt want my baby growing up surrounded by that so i ended the relationship. he said he wanted nothing to do with the baby, refused to come to the first scan and had no interest in it what so ever even though i said all along that i wanted him involved in the baby's life as its us that didnt work out, not the child. I moved to my mum's temporarily and he then started saying that he was going to his lawyer as he wanted to be at the birth (i didnt see it was appropriate and want my mum there as its obviously going to be traumatic) and he started making my life hell.i've spoken to my solicitor and explained everything and now understand that he has no right to put this stress and demands on me and have since told him i am being more than leniant with keeping him informed off any changes (first movements etc). However, when i moved to my mum's it meant a different city which resulted in me having to give up my job. I cant find another one now as i'm so far into the pregnancy and there seems to be no temping work available which is driving me insane as i've always enjoyed working. I've had to sign on which is my worst nightmare. this means that i'm struggling to find a place to live (the council list is sssooo long) and i cant afford anything liveable. Worst of all my mum's now said she wants me out as soon as possible as she cant handle this and i feel so alone. i understand its a pressure for all and i hate doing this to them. all i seem to do is cry and i cant enjoy this pregnancy at all. i have my scan in 2 days and i cant even look forward to it. i;m scared i'm going to resent my child as i was a successful business woman who had everything and now i have nothing. i dont feel i can talk to my family and friends anymore as i dont want to drive them mad with it. i want this baby deep down but everything seems to have gone wrong since i feel pregnant
Welcome to ehealthforum,
You can try speaking to your mom once again and explain to her your situation. She would understand that you cannot find a job right now and you can be with her until you have your delivery and get into a fresh job after it to be able to take care of yourself and the child. Other possibility is that you can consider taking up a job from home or work from home kind of thing. You can also try and see if you can move back into your old job. If the situation is going worse, then consider speaking with a counselor along with your mom (and your partner if it is feasible to you) to try and find a solution to all this. Be in regular follow-up with your gynecologist/obstetrician.
Hope this helps. Take care.
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