Hello,i dont judge you,we all do things in life without thinking sometimes.this is a tough one though i think this depends alot on how much the father means what he says by saying he will be there for the baby.Is he the type to mean what he says?? you've allready said your not sure you believe him on this one.I realise that you think by giving the baby your ex husband's surname you are somehow linking that child to him but i dont really think like that.(it's not like your naming him as the father)You are simply giving your baby this name to link him/her to you and your children.i would wait until you give birth to make your final decision on this one if the father is there at the birth keeps to his word and supports you and baby then i would consider giving the child his name.I think if i was in this situation and i planned on keeping my married surname at least until the kids are grown up and the father didnt keep to his word and support the baby i would deffinately give the baby my married name good luck

I think there is nothing wrong with giving your child your other childrens last name.
My brothers ex has three not his with his last name. If the father to be doesn't like it then he should step up and show he is going to be there .
Because wants you put him on the birth certificate he can always try to get custody but if he is not it will be harder for him.
Deb

Whoa......a puzzler here. First how is the relationship between your ex husband and yourself? Second do you plan on putting the baby's father on the birth certificate? It can be taken by your ex husband that you are linking a baby to him for the sake of looks. It sounds to me that you kinda feel the same. Theoretically you can do whatever you want. What if the father of the baby wants a relationship? A true be there dad. I really do think you might run into more questions from your children later on. No harm will come from this baby having a different last name. The baby will be raised with the same love and upbringing no matter what name you choose. Say in a couple of years your 2 children from your ex go for their weekend visit and they want to know why their new baby brother/sister cannot go? Whatever you say to them most likely it will be remarked back...but mom the baby has daddy's name too. Just a thought. Your birth certificate is used in everything in life. Would you really want father unknown on the birth certificate? Just because you put the baby's father on the birth certificate doesnt give him rights. It acknowledges that he is the father. If he wants rights then let him take you to court for them, then in return he will answer to child support.

No one has the right to judge you or anyone else. Have you asked the father if he would like this baby to have his name? Have you asked your ex if he cares that this baby will have his name? You may not want this baby to seem diff from your other children but they are only going to feel diff if it is made a big deal out of. Lots of siblings now days have diff last names. You just have to get the answers to those two questions and then decide for yourself what you want to do. I wish you the best of luck hun, it's a hard road to be a single parent and I do so hope you have friends and family you can count on to be there for you and be your support system.