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Should I tell my wife about my diagnosis with Bipolar II?

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November 4th, 2011
I'm 28y old and has just been diagnosed with Bipolar II

Should I tell my wife about my diagnosis?

She is very disappointed in me. We have been married for 3 years; during which my mood changes have almost driven her into depression herself. At times I never do any activities, not even those that I like, and some other times I want to go out every day... and then go back to depression.

She cannot understand and has accepted that I'm an unmotivated person with no self-esteem who sometimes gets a kick of energy then falls back to “sleep” again.

I think the only thing that prevents her from talking about divorce is our son. I know she loves me. I see it in her eyes when she looks at me, I also see the blaming look, the “why did you do this to us?” look.

Thanks for your help
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sherief
replied November 4th, 2011
maybe if I put the question in another form.. How should I tell her and when?

Thanks Smile)
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kawi4
replied November 4th, 2011
Of course you should tell her... how else is she supposed to come to an understanding of what you're going through and figure out how to support you? There are support groups for people that are coping with loved ones that have these kinds of illnesses.
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Users who thank kawi4 for this post: sherief 
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sherief
replied November 4th, 2011
Thank you. I did. she does not believe me though. I plan to take her to the psychiatrists so he can convince her. I knew it'd not be easy for her to accept that I'm actually sick and not just selfish or unmotivated or whatever.
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SunnyJim
replied November 7th, 2011
Denial is a real problem for most serious health problem sufferers. You'll need to be understanding of her denial. But, slowly and surely she will eventually believe you. If not then you have more serious problems that need to be dealt with.
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notfromvenus
replied November 9th, 2011
That's too bad. I'm sorry she doesn't believe you, it probably would be a good idea to take her to the shrink with you and he can talk to her about it. Hopefully now that you've been diagnosed you can get treatment and things will start to get better, and hopefully she can get involved and help support you and watch out for early signs of depression.
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toniseesstars
replied November 10th, 2011
I'm really sorry to hear that you're having trouble with your wife not believing you. I think since Bipolar Disorder Type II doesn't have the full blown manic aspect, it may be difficult to recognize. I really wish you both the best of luck and hope you can get treatment to help yourself and save your relationship.
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JoyceS
replied November 20th, 2011
Experienced User
I hope you get the help and treatment for both you and your wife.it's no fun for either of you. Watching from the sidelines (your wife) makes you so angry and depressed. Can't believe she doesn't believe you. my husband and i were relieved to have a name for his illness. I'm still trying figure out what he just doens't want to do and what is genuine bi-polar induced apathy.It's driving me crazy. She needs to be educated about bi-polar. your shrink should be able to help. good luck!
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bipolargay
replied January 23rd, 2012
Yes you should tell her. Just like it took some time for you to accept, understand and educate yourself about the disease, she cannot begin that process until you tell her.
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