My girlfriend and i are having some trouble here. We are trying to have sex, we have tried about 5 times now and we have the same problem. Before i ask, we are both virgins, and both are completely inexperienced in this area and we are both 19. Onto the problem.
When we try to have sex, im not able to "get in her" in fact, i wont even fit. Her opening is much too small. When i try using my finger, she has extreme amounts of pain and asks me to stop. So we stop. And this is about how it happens every time.
I honestly could care less about how long it takes this to happen for us. We could try 1000 times and i wouldn't care. The problem is that she thinks that something is wrong with her. And it is really depressing her.
I dont really know what we should do so i am asking for help here. We thought about her seeing a doctor but thats not something we are able to do right now for other reasons. Although if this is a serious matter im sure she could go see one.
Is she excited and >_>... wet (for lack of a better word) when you try to enter her? That's extremely important she needs to be VERY wet.. the wetter the better, and even then it might still hurt her. If she's nervous, pressured, or feeling as if she owes it to you or something of that nature...if shes un-relaxed at all then she will have trouble with it. Have you talked with her about how shes feeling? Is she really ready to have sex? Does she masturbate at all?... Hm answer those questions please, and if you figure out what's wrong let me know if you please. I can't really say much more without knowing more.
Hm well maybe she has a thick hymen or something. If that's the case then insertion will hurt and she will probably bleed so maybe it would be easier for her to do her first insertion by herself where she can be in control and completely relaxed. She might want to wait about that, she could be scared of the pain and the bleeding so maybe seeing a doctor would be the best thing to do.. asap but I do know what it's like not being able to see the doctor for various reasons which is why I making other suggestions, but don't let her force herself to do anything, and remember it's better to wait to see a doctor (if she's too uncomfortable or thinks something else is wrong) then to do something silly and be forced to go there anyway.
If she's aroused and lubricated it's hard for me to see what in a normal sense would cause her pain so bad that she can't accept your finger. It could be she's more afraid than in pain or that like others have mentioned that she's not ready for this. I think it may be helpful for her to talk to her OB GYN, maybe have a quick examination just as assurance to her that her gear is all normal. If her Hymen is abnormal it would be the easiest way to find out and resolve the issue.
Be patient, be honest with her, enjoy the things that are working in your life togather. You're all good.