For about 2 years now ive been really down and moody. I dont have alot of friends and dont get along with alot of my family.
I have selfharmed throughout them 2 years and finding it hard to stop.
I have reasons for this but i dont know what drove me to do it? I just did.
This year has been the worst for me, i self harm everyday and make myself sick, i dont know whats happening to me. I am trying to stop myself but i cant. I feel like im 2 people, there is me when im just normal and then there is another me who is distructuve and mean and evil. But i know its me, i know that might sound stupid but its the only way i can put it.
I feel like im going crazy, i dream and think weird things and words just go round in my head and i dont know where they come from,like having a conversation with yourself in a way.
Im only 16 but its really scaring me.
Ive had councilling in the past just to get over some family and school issues but this problem is getting in the way of everything. I cant concentrate in school and im failing my subjects and getting into trouble with my parents and teachers. I dont know what do. Is it just me?
I hope someone can reply with some advice for me, to tleast put my mind at rest or maybe to point me in the right direction as in what to do.
You are not going crazy, don't worry! But you have some emotional problems and this is what is making you depressed to the point of self-harming. You absolutely must get someone on your side who will get you the help you need, whether it be a trusted teacher, a parent, or your doctor.
It would be impossible for anyone here to accurately diagnose your symptoms but I work with young people and I know that self-harming, making yourself sick and so on is all symptomatic of an overwrought nervous system. Exams, peer pressure, family concerns, relationships ... at 16 you have immense pressures on you and you need someone to talk to about it. You sound rather isolated, with no really close friend to talk to. So get a professional to talk to you: a therapist, a counsellor, a friendly doctor.
Please don't feel alone - you can post here as there are many good people who will listen to you and try to help. I will do what I can, too, but please try to get some professional help.
i would try and get help but what if my parents find out, they dont even know about my councilling because i kind of black mailed my councillor into not telling them. They would be furious with me. And what could they do for me? I doubt there is much they can do. It is the first time ive contacted one of these talking pages, i was just looking for information about what may be wrong iwth me and this came up. Im glad to know im not crazy, but i dont really like what is happening to me and i hope i can stop before i become really bad, i dont really want to be taken away from my family eventhough they drive me crazy. can i ask a question??? are these messages i am writing to you private?
You are NEVER alone here! I for one know if you were my daughter and you told me you were having these feelings, I would do everything in my power to see you got the professional help you needed. There are wonderful doctors and programs that can help you. I do hope you're parents are understanding and will do whatever it takes to be by your side. I wouold want my daughter to be able to talk to me about these things and not feel she had to go through this alone. She turns 25 this year...........we have a great relationship. This is not something you need to go through alone, and its not something you can just FIX....you are only 16. If you don't seek help, it will only get worse. ITs NOT YOUR FAULT.....I know its gonna be tough to try to explain to them and tell them, but the sooner you do, the better and it will all be out in the open and then you can start to seek help. I wish you were closer............I'd be there with you to help you explain to them! Keep in touch. Feel free to PM me anytime! HUGS!
my name is melissa i am 15 years old and i have ptsd and i have also severe deppresive disorder and i am also i cutter and i dont really know why i stared to cut my self in the first place but when i first cut myself i felt so emty and then i told my mom the next day and she was crying so then she took me to the emergency room and i had to stay there for 5 hours and they told me that i am going to have to stay so they took me to the unit so i stayed in the hospital for a while and when i came out of the hospital i felt like this new person and everthing but then a few weeks later i felt ten times worse so i started to cut myself again and my perents dont know about cause i dont want to tell them..........please help
Look i know what your going through... atleast you have the guts to tell someone, i have to come online to find help because no one in my family cares to be honest.
I really dont know what to say, maybe you should go back to your doctor or tell your mother........ if you could tell your mother once then you can tell her again or tell a really locse friend who might go in with you. I found out talking to someone can really help, i talk to someone called Lynne, she is amazing and i dont cut half as much because i feel so loved by her, you should feel this with your mother. Have you not had continious therapy or medicines with your hospitalization?
I know what its like to just have to cut, its a releasing system, it feels amazing when you are doing it but when people find out what you are doing they think your a freak, they dont understand it. Are there any underlying reasons for your depression or has it come out of nowhere?
Im really sorry if i was any help, but keep in contact, we can atleast try and do this together........ XxX
I feel like i am all alone in the world and there is none to talk to. It seems like everybody in my family hates me. I know there is a few who like me but it starts to get to a person. I have been to foster care and felt just like money they were getting. I have no friends and people have made fun of me since i was little. I was abused by my foster dad and my grandma. I don't really want to cut myself but it feels like i have to just to feel something besides being sad and lonely. I have been trying not to cut my arms but it is some kind of force or something that i can't even fight it enough to not cut myself. It is not easy being by myself almost all the time. I sometimes just wish i could hug someone and maybe i would feel better a little. Even when i was little my parents didnt seem to care about me. I feel like i am the stupid one out of me and my brother and my two half brothers. My half brothers are going to college and getting a's and b's and one of the knows a lot of spanish the other one is like a walking dictionary. And my brother also gets a's and b's in high school. Even my parents are smart they both went to college and mother got a CNA license and father learned how to sing and play the piano really well. Me on the other hand i got c's and d's in high school. It just seems i have to study to feel like i am smart enough. So in short i dont want to hurt myself but i feel i have to to feel better.
i started self- harming last year and didnt think much of it but then i felt sad and worhtlesss all the time i would cry for no reason and get upset. i stopped for about a month but am now doing it again and do it again when the cuts fade it makes me feel better but its hard to hide them sometimes i told some friends last time i done it but they havent forgot it and bring it up sometimes so i dont want to tell anyone bt i think i might be depressed. i cant tell my parents cause they will be angry and the teacher i trust at school will ring my parents for sure and then i will be in trouble and everyone will be angry at me and say im doing it for attention but im not i just need help but i dont knw how to get it wihtout hurting others around me. please someone help me
Girl, i know exactly how you feel... [[trust me]].
Everytime i have a pang of sadness i cut myseld, it does feel good while you are doing it, but the scars are unsightly,, trust me, ive ruined my chances of going out swimming and wearing nice short dresses because ive messed my leg up. I vowed never to cut my arm again! Because your arms will at one point be seen by someone. If i where you id go to your doctor and just explain to him you feel depressed all the time, maybe leave out the self harm part because he may ring your parents if you are under 18.
As for your friends, as ive learnt they arnt your real friends if they bring it up. My EX friends would constantly take the piss of me, calling me edward scissor legs and the blade babe. The only real person you can trust with your cutting is yourself. My parents dont know i cut either, and i wont go to doctors but you should darling, you need to find help and feel better in yourself. You can beat this, just take it one step at a time. Keep me up to date with how you are and if you need to talk to me at any time just ask for my email and ill give it to you ok hun! STAY STRONG! xXx
Yeah i know what you meen about the swimming thing and stuff cause i started using my razor on my leg and i cant go swimming cause people will see. yeah i know its hard to cover up on your wrist but i have always thought of something lyk colouring over it with markers or wearing an long sleeveed top underneath in pe. I dont think there is much of a chance of me seeing a doctor cause i cant risk my parents finding out even if i do leave out the self harm. your ex friends seem relii out of order saying all those things to you they should of been supporting you not bringing you down. Im luckyy at the moment cause i sprained my arm while playing out with mates so im wearing a bandage and it covers up the cuts on my wrist. Wb xx
how old are you darling?
You should go see a doctor or councillor about it, trust me nip it in the bud before it gets any worse. Its not good, its not clever. Go see someone about it, a doctor wont go straight to your parents you know, they should only tell your parents if they think your in any immidiate danger! You did know that yes? Xx
13 started cutting when i was twelvee just over a year now. i know its not good but its hard not to do it doctors are rubbish anyway and i dont actually know if i can trust them. i want to tell i teacher at school who i trust and like but i dont know what i would say or how to go about it and the last thing i want in the world is my parents finding out. i had a really bad day today aswell i couldnt concentrate at all just kept thinking about jumping off the school roof :S im weird i know x no i didnt know that
Listen to the words of Jade....I met her here and she admitted to me she was a cutter. I love her as if she were my own daughter and through our emails hope I've helped her as well as be her friend. You need to see someone and let them try to help you. As said above, it will only get worse. There is hte law of patient/ doctor confidentiality!!!So unless you are a threat to your self.....which I hope not, your parents would not need to be involved...ok, NOW coming from a parent....if you were my daughter, I'd want you to come to me so I could help you with this and you not go it alone!
Girl i started cutting at 14 and now i cant stop, its a vicious cycle, once you start you want to carry on. Tell your teacher but you have to make her promise not to tell anyone, she cant break confidentiality anymore than you can.
Im on a massive downer at the moment too, but you have to try and not think about it, it kills me not to but you have to talk to someone about it, otherwise you will spiral into depression and find no loopholes. Do you seriously want to feel like you have to cut yourself for realease for the rest of your life?
Panda this lady here is my very own fairygodmother, if i didnt have her i think id be dead right now, she is my shining star and i lvoe her more than i do my own family! She has helped me with EVERYTHING! Lynne i love you dearly, more than life itself [[ ok im getting emotional right now lol :'( ]]
But seriously, listen to us, you dont want to be riddled with scars for the rest of your life like me, i cant even bare a man or doctor look at my body and everything has to be done in secret. What kind of life are you giving yourself, if id have had people like lynne when iwas younger i think id have felt better about ymself and being given the guidence and support to not cut. Do somthing about it before its to late, seriously. Think of when your older, your prom, your 1st boyfriend, your wedding, having children. What are you going to say to people when they see your scars? Think wisley girl! This is the only chance of life we get,,, unfortunatley! Xx
i will do anything to sop i promise and i will try and talk to my teacher but i cant promise anything. i will keep u updated on wht goes on . i understand what you saying and it hurts thinking about what you saying cause i know its true :'(