hey, i understand, n im sorry ur having a hard time at the mo and about ur father. do u have anyone you can talk to? i remember certain bits and peices but not really anythink suffieient either, its like its there somewhere but i just cant reach it. i think i need help putting the pieices together somehow.
you cant force yourself to remember things but it has a habit of coming back to you in pieces in nightmares and images and things. maybe u could ask to be refered to a counselor? x