Rash or Herpes? How do I tell?

I have herpes and have not had an outbreak sence over a year and a half ago.. My boyfriend and I have been in a monogamous relationship for a year and one month.. recentally he's had these bumps on his shaft right benieth his head but their not exactally clustered, one will be on the bottom and three will be on the top, sometimes their are white othertimes their like red wholes.. i was looking at them once and wiped off undie-fuzzys and it wiped of the white bumps. it healed faster but hurt like hell for him. somethimes i think the bottom of his head might be inflamed and appear red but i dont pay attention to that normally to know for sure. he doesnt want me to worry but he doesnt want to see a doctor cause its embarrising... Its hard to convice him cause he thinks it might be some kind of rash, we cant tell cause some times he'll forget to take a shower after sex for 3-4 days and then they'll happen.. Is it a rash or herpes?