pus on tonsils

Hi,
I have been having trouble with my tonsils for a while. When I was small I would sometimes get tonsillitis but over the last 4 years or so I get it - or something like it - very frequently.

Sometimes I would get tonsil stones in the past due to my very crypty tonsils.
Now however, every time there is white stuff on my tonsils it is definitely not tonsil stones but is pus! Yuck, I know sorry

Antibiotics DO clear it up though - which suggests it's a bacterial infection. But it soon comes back in a couple of weeks. I can sometimes stave it off for a while by keeping my mouth very clean and gargling with antibacterial stuff such as diluted TCP and listerene at regular points through the day. Using new toothbrushes. Spraying the tonsil (its usually always my left tonsil) with a water filled oral syringe etc

I think its pretty normal (from what I've read from other sufferers during my research) that after almost every appearance of the pus, there is then left a missing piece of tonsil when it goes away... gaping holes and the like. Which of course, irritatingly makes for more crags. But on the other hand sometimes it does remove a troublesome section of tonsil also. It's a bit like having a slow and very crude tonsillectomy lol!

My friend did in fact have tonsillitis so many times and so severely that the doctor thought she'd had a tonsillectomy when he examined her throat!

Anyway all this I had been learning to handle well and keeping it clean like I mentioned before, and thought (hoped) I had it cracked and had learned how to keep my throat healthy.
I certainly don't want my tonsils removed for several reasons, such as:
A few members of my family used to get tonsillitis frequently but then it stopped when they were a little older than me. I'm hoping the same will happen with me... that I'll just "grow out of it" as it were.

Also I have read many cases of people getting tonsillitis type syptoms even after having them removed... and I think I'd rather have it eating away at actual tonsils rather than my throat. If that makes sense. Also I know that tonsils can sort of grow back to a degree.

My tonsils (well the left one) is a very persistant little... [insert rude word of your choice here] and I am pretty sure it would still find some way of being infected, even after it was removed!!!

Oh yeah and also I'm scared of surgery.

So those are the reasons I won't have them removed.

But now I have a new problem
When inspecting my tonsils last night I noticed that I can make my tonsil OPEN. Yes that's right, OPEN And this sort of valley thing appears and there are a couple of white bits inside oozing from somewhere deeper within.

Gah it's so frustrating! How can I make the white stuff go away (goo away? lol) when it's hidden in a secret chamber which is extremely hard to get to and seems to be PRODUCING the pus? BAH. EW.

Also... what if because there's that sort of opening bit.... it means that that entire chunk of tonsil is going to break off? IN MY MOUTH. In my throat??? That is so sick. So disgusting. And so worrying. What if I wake up with a chunk of actual tonsil in my mouth?
Probably pretty extreme but... they do seem very volatile and sort of.. rotting away perhaps.

Hmm maybe it's time I went to the ENT doctor about it.

Anyway, any tips or comments from people that can relate, would be greatly appreciated.

I hate having tonsil problems because it means I can't kiss anyone. Huh.

Thanks for your time and advice!

Stan