you should probably talk to someone and get help for this..it sounds like you have just gotten so used to throwing up that you have an over active gag reflex now and can throw up whenever, this sometimes can happen when you do this for a long period of time...get some help for this, it isn't a healthy habit..dont be afraid to talk to someone that can help you

im really afraid, and i pretend like a happy positive person all the time
i know that i need help but somehow it's so hard to break thr the shell :[

Don't be afarid to ask for help. You may fear people judging you, but if you talk to a professonial, there is nothing to fear, they are trained to deal with such things and not to judge. You're not the only person who has ever delt with this, and if you talk to a therapist they understand this and may be able to offer you help. There are many different ways of doing this: Talk to someone you REALLY trust and feel comfortable with, try to talk to your parents and explain that you'd like to see a therapist for some help, talk to a counceler at school, or some cities/towns have local "help" numbers that you may be able to use. It may be hard to do, but if you feel in your heart that there is a problem, then you are right. It may be hard to talk to your parents, but most parents love and care about their children and want to help them in any way possible. Give it a try. =)

i agree with lil scorpio

its good that you're not denying that you do have a problem with this..admitting it is the first step..now you should seek help so you can get through this...anyone that cares about you will not shame you for this..they will want to do anything they can to help you

I am the same age as you and i understand how confusing this all is. I hated the feeling of a full stomach and felt incredibly guilty after food. However you need help. Even eating one "good" thing that you don't feel the need to purge such as an apple or pasta is a good first step. Do this everyday. Bulimia doesn't make you loose weight it makes you ill. Remember that slwoly changing your habits will help you greatly.

GOOD LUCK ^^ XX