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Problems with cumming while having sex

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i have problems with cumming while having sex... i must say that i have an attraction to my girlfriend, and she also do things that arouses me during foreplay. But i have problems cumming while we're doing the real thing. There are also incidents, just like last night, that my penis suddenly softens down while we were doing it.
I just faked her and told her that I already cummed inside her to justify what happened to my penis.

What must be my problem?

I have this cumming issues ever since, about 3 years ago. But the erection thing is something new to me. Please help me doc, thanks.

I have another girl that I usually have sex regularly, BUT NEVER did I have problems cumming. To think that we do not even do much foreplay. I cum as fast as 1 minute with the another girl. But why do i have problems cumming when Im doing it with my girlfriend?

Im turning 31 next month, 227lbs, 5'8 in height...
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replied July 12th, 2010
Hi there, thank you for posting your question. My area of expertise is in human sexual dysfunction. I hope I can be of some small help to you.

I think your problem may be so-called “ejaculatory incompetence” or delayed ejaculation. This is complex. Usually the man does not have the same difficulty when alone and masturbating but for some reason finds that it is very difficult to orgasm when his penis is inside his partner’s vagina. Women have an analogous problem often referred to an Anorgasmia.

In your case your ejaculatory incompetence is "situational" that is it only occurs with some sexual partners -- lady A and not with others -- lady B. This is very difficult to explain.

One cause of this, though by no means the only cause, is the so-called Traumatic Masturbatory Syndrome or TMS. This in turn can arise from the practise of masturbating in the face down position. Another cause is the use of certain antidepressant medications in the so-called SSRI category. Prozac would be an example.

More often than not however no cause can be identifies. Perhaps you may need to discuss this with a Sex Councillor. It can be resolved through behavioural therapy. Show your partner how you masturbate, hold her hand while she does it with you. She should also verbally encourage you to come. Once you learn how to ejaculate in her company by whatever means, you can then move on to intercourse.

As a result of the worry of not being able to ejaculate with lady A you are watching yourself and this is now beginning to give you erectile dysfunction. I'm tempted to suggest you stick with lady B or her likes. I hope that does not sound too frivolous. I'm available online if you think it might help.

Dr Andrew Rynne.

www.andrewrynne.com



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