Monday, June 15, 2009
4:35 PM

Hey people im new here, found this site when I googled "my ex is prego & we don't know if it's mine". Holy Moly 28,600 results and this place looked legit so I am here.

Ok I am 29 she is 24 we were broke up but obviously still talking sortof, she was seeing someone else also. When she told me she was making a baby, it didn't feel right to me. It was no secret she was seeing dude, I am kind of a "psycho stalker" (in a good way, I love her, I just like to know when I am being lied to.) and I had found her car/his house not far from mine. Any way I did not feel right about it at first but then I started lying to myself again and just going with it, she swore up and down there was no other possibility and I was the dad. She was staying at her dads at this point and just stopped answering my calls and not replying texts and I seriously almost lost it lots of times. I finally got an answer one day after weeks of nothing, suprised and dumbfounded I said "Hi, so are you still pregnant?" her: "yes" "Ok and you still think I am the dad?" her: "um I don't know." I can't describe the way I felt after hearing "um I don't know". I have never felt so many different feelings at one time before and for sure not as many emotions that I could not stuff somewhere to be dealt with later. This really ripped me in half like I was a sheet of paper and then the giant hands held me up as if to examine me at eye level. Each half of me dangled lifeless, pinched between the thumbs and pointer fingers of the girl I loved and held out at arms length as if I had stepped in something stinky. She looked back and forth at both of me with no expression and just let go and I fell like two feathers floating back and forth weightless each feather having razor sharp edges sliced the other in two with every pass until all of me had fallen to the ground. I looked like the remains of a great feast of a partially domesticated feline who had been left without food.
She grew hungry and nature took it's course, she crouched low to the ground becoming one with the blades of grass now parting as she slipped through and closing back behind her. Her eyes locked in on something and she paused briefly pressing her paws into the ground making sure her claws were sharp and ready and like a bolt of lightning she struck. Leaving the ground after a few steps she too could fly for long enough. Reaching out with those claws she had sharpened just for this and it was over no sooner than it had been cleared for take off she pierced the skin and they crashed together. The details following the crash are sure to cause upset stomach's but ended with one happy cat ready for a nap in the sun she hung one arm over the side of the railing as her tail softly twitched and her eyelids grew heavy. Once serving a purpose aiding in flight and shedding water when it rained. Now stained red from my own blood waiting for a gust of wind to carry me back to the earth I lay below her on the ground a pile of feathers.

Sorry I lost focus for a second and now I must go I have not even begun to ask my question and am not sure this is the place for my story but I suppose I will see if any comments are made weather or not I should continue here or find another place to turn my feelings into little black letters strung out like me across blank whiteness inside little square boxes where I feel safe to let them free. Thank you either way because I feel lots better already.
Dizzzney