Do you see what happens when you don't use good birth control? You are asking us not to judge you, but you are pregnant with your third child, with different fathers, and NOW you are asking for help? There isn't much we can do for you at this point dear. You now have three kids to think about raising to the best of your ability, and you aren't even married yet. How can you say you "fall in love all over again" with a man that won't even take responsibility for his child? You need to find out why you are letting yourself in for such chaos in your life. If you don't start taking charge and respecting yourself, it's no wonder these men don't either. Protect yourself and make sure you are on adequate birth control before you have sex again. Your hormones are working overtime due to all the pregnancies. I am sorrry about your dad and brother. I have lost both mine too, but you need to move on from your grief after two years and get to the business of YOUR life now. They will always hold a special place in your heart, but don't let it cripple you now that you are needed by these children. I don't suggest medication while you are pregnant, but your doctor would know better than I. Sorry to sound so harsh, but the fact is, you set your own life up for all this heartbreak. After the first child, and no husband, you should have known better than to have any more until you established a stable home for yourselves. You need to stop crying and start acting like an adult. You can be madly in love with a man and STILL protect yourself from this kind of predicament. And I hope you do so in the future.

i am asking for help for my depression! my daughter is the result of rape! and my sons father and i were happy then he up and left! it amgers me off a lil that u can judge and lecture me on birth control when u dont know the whole story! with this baby i was one the pill and we used a condom! soooo can sum one please explain to me how this could happen!! totalllllllll shock for me to find this out! haha move on from the grief of my brother and father! yea right! we still have one trial to go thru for my brothers murders! and my dad will have been dead one year aug 22! my daughter my first child was born when i was 15! i couldnt give her up i just could neve4r do that! ppl tell me that me being raped is not my fault but when ppl go on and on andon about how i should havenever had more kids blah blahbah well my daguther wasnt planned! obvisly but ur right! i do need to stand up but when i find a guy that actually doesnt scare me i take a liking to him! cuz well all but 2 of my relationships have been abusive and those last what maybe aweek bc i get scared taht what happend to me 5 years ago isgoing to happen again! SERIOUSLY PPL I AM ONLY ASKING ABOUT MY DPRESSION! I WOULD RATHER NOT HAVE SOMEONE I DONT EVEN KNOW GO THRU MY LIFE WITH FINE TOOTH COMBS!!! i knew this was going to be a bad idea! just forget it!

Sorry, but we read the information as it is written, and you said nothing about rape in your post. We see so much of this on the forum, girls having children with multiple sex partners. Either you didn't use your birth control correctly, or you are one of the unluckiest girls I have ever seen. I am familiar with ALL your circumstances. My brother was also murdered, but we never caught his killers. I had my first child at 17 the first time and only time I had sex before I was married to his father. And I lost my dad also. Let me ask you this...what are your choices...to try and move on from your grief, and when I say this, I am NOT telling you not to grieve...rather try not to let it take control over the other parts of your life...or let it eat you up inside to the point of not functioning? Why do you keep choosing men that are abusive? This is something you need to find out. Apparently from your post, I am not the only one who has supposedly angered and judged you so you can't totally blame me. I go by the what's in the post. And I am not judging you. Just wondering why so many girls seem to have problems with their birth control, and multiple sex partners. If you are depressed, talk to your physician and see what he can do for you, but the rest is up to YOU. I do sympathize with you, but I also know you need to help yourself now, since it is just you and your kids. You need to redefine your choices.

i didnt say anything about the rape bc its not sumthing that i like to talk about! i choose men that i think are good for me and after being with them they end up scaring me! this last relationship i had was great! but i guess the baby scares him and thats why we are not togtether! i took the pill everyday like i was supposed to.... never missed one! actually took it up to the day i found out i was pregnant.... unfortuntly i have only had 2 sex partners besides my rapist... so tech, 3 i guess,, and for sumreason i end up with 3 kids! my bf of my last relationship had been having sex for over 6 mths...was on my birth control the whole time! never missed it! then all of a sudden im pregnant...idk maybe i am unlucky...i am working on moving from my grief but not as easy as it looks on paper!

You're right. What you are going through is not easy to get over. And it's probably even harder when you're talking about dealing with some compounded depression ontop of all of it. Your hormones are working overtime, and I'm sure it all seems very overwhelming. Unless you've gone through severe depression, you can't fully understand it. And it's NOT something you can get over by yourself. There are some medications that you can take while you are pregnant...tho none of them are totally safe. You have to take that into account when looking at the overall picture tho. Constantly being stressed out and depressed isn't good for the baby either! Talk to your doctor and get help for yourself. YOU DESERVE IT--no matter the choices you've made in the past, or some of the ones that were made for you (i.e. the rape.) I know it's hard...but choose not to be a victim. You already have two children who need there mom and whom are dependent on you. YOU ARE NOT BROKEN! Other people have gone through similar situations (unfortunately), but they have come out on top...and YOU WILL TOO!!!! Never be ashamed of needing medication to help you get through the depression. It's a chemical reaction that might not be permanent or life-long. But do what is right for you NOW to get you through NOW. My prayers are with you as you find what works for you. I've been through hell and back myself (in my own circumstances) and know that it's going to be an uphill fight...but you CAN do it! Hang in there...and best wishes. BTW...if you can't "afford" a psychiatrist (does NOT mean you're crazy...they're just the ones who know what meds work best and can work with ya better), there are ones paid for by the government to help you out. Just look for your local assistance programs. Don't ever let money be an excuse for not getting the help you need either. YOU CAN DO THIS! If I did, I know anyone can. Good luck.

thank u sooo much! that helped alot to hear that im not to blame for all this! i have my appt on monday first thing and i wll definatly bring this up to my doctor! i know its starting to stress the baby out cuz im gettin my morning sickness bak!!! thanks again!!

You are most welcome. EVERYTHING happens for a reason. Don't beat yourself up. But do take precautions so it doesn't happen again. You can't change the past, but you can definitely make your future brighter. Best wishes to ya!