If you plan to keep the child, and have closed the door on the relationship with the biological father than I recommend looking into ways that a surrogate father can play a part in the child's life.

If I were in the same situation, I would probably not inform the father of the child but would inform the child later in life.

thanks, i will keep that in mind.

I wish I had never told my ex. I regret it. He doesn't play a real role in my daughter's life. He wants whatever perks he can get but no responsibility. He contributes nothing. The money he does have he spends on pot and the money he does make is under the table so no child support can be taken out. He doesn't see her regularly yet when he wants to see her he can. I wish I hadn't told him so this new guy in my life could be her father figure and not the deadbeat one who comes and goes as he pleases. You can never "untell" once he knows.

the thing is the babys father said that he will not leave me. But like i have been told you can never really trust a guy to say that. He is in jail no less, i am not even sure he will be there if i tell him. Hes told me he will but i dont trust it.

GO with your instincts. You'll never go wrong if you follow your gut.

i wouldnt tell him... as much as some guys say theyre going to be there for you and theyre kid at the beginning they jump ship. I know my ex did and he doesnt even talk to me now. Heck, he got me pregnant and i havent seen him since July. He CAME OVER my house to drop off my stuff and didnt even have the decency to come in and see how im doing even though im pregnant with his son. I am in the same situation with a guy that loves me and the baby, and I wish my babys dad didnt know he was the father because he is a deadbeat and my boyfriend is going to be so much of a better father to my son. if you dont tell him, youll never have to worry about him becoming a deadbeat nusiance in your babys life.

The thing is he has a daughter now and his mom has her. He doesnt do anything for his daughter now.

This new guy wants to be but on the brith crtifacate. Oh and i am getting married to this new guy in March.

im pregnant to my ex, and im not telling him, and when he does find out im telling him its someone elses because hes already decided im cheating on him anyway and that i left to be with someone else. I already have one child to him that he knows about, and has supervised visits with, which i wish he didnt coz hes into pot and crime and cant hold a job. Not all guys are good influences to have around your child, and id say your ex probably isnt.

But in saying that i wouldnt put your boyfriend on the birth cert because that means he has as many rights to the child as you do, and so could cause problems if you ever broke up

another example tonight.. i told him about the doctors appointment.. got a 2 word response. ok and bye. Its stressful enought to be worrying and pregnant. just let the baby daddy go. the new guy will be better for you and the baby. also, dont put your bfs name on the birth certificate. since you know its your exs apparently its considered fraud. just leave the fathers name blank and let your new guy adopt the baby after you get married.

i never looked at it that way. I will have to see what the law says. I am just trying to do what is right for my baby. The only thing i know that is right is not telling the brith father cause he doesnt even take responsblity for his daughter. Every once in a whilie he will buy her something. But since brith his mom has had her.
Why are some men the way they are. I mean the brith father has told me that if he ever got me pregnunt that he woud love it. But when I told him I might be he shoved it off. Since I told him that I havent seen nor heard from him, and another thing is that the next day when I went over to his house I find out that hes in jail for over 6 months.

Definately look into the law. Your baby doesnt deserve a guy like that in his life. Im telling you, if your fiance loves you and the baby hell wait and adopt it. Thats what mine is planning on doing after he finishes college.

Well I told the exs mom about me being with child. She sounded as if she didnt want her son to be a part of the babys life. So I have decided not to but the ex on the brith paper.