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24, pregnant, and single... but because I left him.

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I left my boyfriend of 4 years because I was 20 weeks pregnant, and he couldn't control his temper, and intolerable name calling. Since I left him, I moved in with my parents who have picked up the pieces and have paid for all expenses because I lost my job and couldn't afford the apartment he refused to move into with me. After I had made my decision to move out He and I wanted to try and make things work so we started by going to a counseling session. 2 days after he and I got in another fight because I went on a hospital tour and he wanted to go... except he has already told me he won't come near my family (who he believes is responsible for our breakup) or even the new town I live in! So the next day he told me he was done with me... again... and I cried so hard, again... my parents decided it would be a good idea to make a trip to his house since he won't come to ours.

This is where it gets intense. So we showed up at his mothers house where he lives, though he was the only one home, and my father just wanted to speak to him man to man, but my "baby daddy" instantly thought we were attacking him by coming to his house. He then disrespected my parents, and wanted to even fight my father! The things he said my family that day are unforgettable. After that, I changed my number to prevent nasty phone calls. I then invited him and his mother to the ultrasound to be nice, where he showed up thinking he has rights to be there, and then started calling my father names again, in the waiting room! After, he told me he was sorry and he wants me back and to be in the baby's life. I know for some crazy reason I still have feeling for him, but to let him back in my life would be like slapping my parents in the face, and not healthy for me or my baby... How can I allow him in my life while still respecting my family?
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replied May 12th, 2011
I kicked out my boyfriend a couple of times. The first was because of the stress he was causing me and the baby at a very early stage. He came back and wanted to try...and then started bailing on coming when he said he would or doing the things he said he would for me, becaue I'm on rest and not allowed to do alot. After realizing he was only coming around when he needed soemthing, and it was making me feel like crap on top of belittling me for everything that went wrong in our relationship, I told him I was done. Its hard, but you ahve to do whats best for you and the baby. Having someone unreliable and treats you or your family like dirt isn't good for either of you. My family is going to help me, like your family is helping you, find the comfort you're looking for in the fact taht you have a support system there, and not focus on whether he will or won't be there--I'm still learning how to do that. My Boyfriend convinced me everything wrong in our relationship was my fault, but I know in my heart, I tried, and if he doesn't see that then I deserve better. And so do you, you have the strength of two people right now to stand up for yourself.
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