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Pregnant and scared

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December 3rd, 2009
i am 25 13weeks today prego! am very scared i cant tell my family about it, it will tear them apart worse than it has done to me. i found out when was 4weeks so i told my boyfriend that i was pregnant, all the things he said was not what i was expecting him to say, it got me mad, a week later i lied to him that i lost the baby and it wasn't his in the 1st place my hormones were kicking really hard, very depressed, mad and sad. i never felt this way in my life. i still feel the same, i can't over come it at all! and again a week later when i was 6 weeks i told him to forgive me for the things i said,and we became stronger in our feelings but now, my stomach its poping out already, and reality is heating me again, my plan is to leave and go away where i know nobody and star all over again. me finding someone who love is no problem i already have this guy and told him am pregnat and he ready to role with me. but i love my man soo much, just that am confused i have no idea what to do. help


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replied December 4th, 2009
Relationships and Marriage Answer A8226
Hello.

I agree with you that you are in a difficult situation. And it is not an easy choice you have to make here. But I hope to be of some help.

First of all, it will help you immensely if you work on the relationship with your boyfriend, rather and forming a new one just because the new person accepts you with the baby. The basis of any relationship is trust and love. If you are sure you love your boyfriend very much, then trying to talk to him and make your relationship work is worth the efforts.

On the other hand, if you are at present more concerned about the baby, you might have to take a rational decision. When I say 'rational' it means a decision which takes you to your desired goal, whatever the goal may be. So, if you have a goal of spending the rest of your life loving your baby and being with a person who accepts you both, then you know what decision to make. But if on the other hand, your goal is to have a relationship based on love and trust, and really want to enjoy it, then you might have to work harder than you are doing right now.

I will not give you any advice such as forget and forgive and move on. But I would really like it if you can think rationally and be less disturbed, whatever is the decision. That's the key to happiness after all, isn't it?

I wish you good luck.

Regards

This post is for the purpose of providing medical information and is not a substitute for a face-to-face consultation with a doctor. This post is neither intended to give or rule out a diagnosis, nor to create a doctor-patient relationship.



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