First off, that is a horrible thing to say:
"i dont think i can bear it if it comes out retarded" How could you say something like that? If thats how you feel thats ok, but why would you say something like that? Just so you know, at the 12 week screening they look to see if your baby has any problems and you can choose to continue with the pregnancy or not...but that is disgusting to say.
If you dont think your grown up enough, why keep the baby in the first place? Why not give him or her up for adoption.
If you got 2 positive pregnancy tests, go to your doctor.
Why would you think and talk that way about an innocent life?

My doctor told me that health defects like downs syndrome, autism, spinal bifida etc. are less common with pregnancies at young ages, the chances are like 100-600,000 or so. doesnt mean that they dont happen sometimes but the chances are slim.

And you should not use such a word like retarded.

I apologize for using that word, the connotation was that it would be mentally ill; it was not meant to be derogatory.

I just cannot bear to birth a child that is mentally disabled on my account. I took a DAY AFTER PILL!!! I have no idea what kind of effects that will have on the child I am currently carrying and I am scared that it is a responsibility that will be extremely difficult to carry. Then again, I know that my underaged sexual activity has consequences and I will try to bear them as maturely as possible. However, the question lies within the fear I stated, which is "Will the Plan B contraceptive adversely effect my baby?"

When did you have sex, did you take it within the instructed time period?
The day after pill is just hormones, there shouldnt be any serious damage done.
But since you got two positive pregnancy tests, you should go to your doctors office to get a urine test and blood test done and to find out your due date.
You can also ask them if Plan B would have any effects to the baby, and they would answer your questions.

Plan B has no negative effect on a baby.
It only prevents pregnancy and its specifically made for emergency situations, if conception already happened then there is no side effect on an existing baby.

Good luck daslautlacht!

You should go to the doctor! And don't worry about things you have no control over. Stress isn't good for you.

krystine, chill, so she used the word retarded, its not like shes calling you retarded or anyone else for that matter, you shouldnt make her feel bad for a poorly chosen word

OP everything i know suggests your baby will be fine, but i can look it up tomarrow afternoon if youd like and get back to you with solid facts (my daughters bday party is tomarrow) i also got pregnant at 17, had my daughter at 18, if you need to talk we'll be here for you

OP, don't panic - it's very natural that you're worried about your baby being disabled in some way and I think there's not one woman who hasn't wondered how she'd cope if her baby was unwell.

That said, I don't think you've got anything to worry about. I had a friend who took the morning after pill while pregnant too and her child is fine. Also, it's not unheard of for women to continue taking the birth control pill while they are unknowingly pregnant. Compared to smoking, drinking alcohol and using illegal drugs your risks are minimal.

Good luck and please keep us posted about your scan!

i just said she should choose a word other than that because some could get offended by it.
so chill.
i didnt say anything rude, just told her some may take offense to what she had posted...

My boyfriend didn't pull out while I thought I was ovulating, so the day after that we went and got plan b. I accidentally took the second pill first, but the pharmacist said that both of the pills were the same and that it wouldn't make a difference, but I was still skeptical. Now, I am pregnant...

Besides the risk of my infant becoming somehow disabled, I am also worried about whether or not I am up to the task of raising it. I have a lot of plans for the future and I am SO SO scared that this will halt everything. I am so scared to tell my parents because they hate me and we have had problems with physical abuse, but I'm more scared to break the news to my boyfriends parents as they have done everything they could to help me and support me and be there for me as if I was their daughter. It's hard to break the news that I have gone past the taboo for social standards, but then again I realize that my purpose is to continue populating the earth and that I have merely joined the circle of life here.

It would be so easy if this would have just happened when I was 18.. or 25... but 200 years ago they were having babies as soon as they started their period so.. I can't be totally in the wrong, right? I mean it's only natural to secretly be envious of babies that other people have and want one of your own, and it's only natural to explore sexually with your partner. It's all instinct.

It reminds me of how my cat was still a kitten when she had her first litter... no one told HER that she wasn't mature enough to raise a litter of six kittens....

Oh gosh, I hate the "it's natural" excuse. Yes, your body is physically ready to have a baby and I'm very glad you've made your decision and are sticking with it, but please don't try to make any excuses. The world has changed completely, as it was also natural to be married by the time you were having children and to have a home and whatnot. It also was unnatural for women to go on to secondary education, for women to have professional jobs, and all this adds to why it's not the norm now. Some 13 year olds can also have healthy children, doesn't mean it's natural or they are anywhere near capable of raising one. In this day and age, it's not natural, but hey, you can do it and we have great examples of mothers on this board who have.

I don't mean to be coming off as an problem, but the "instinct" excuse flew out the window once we became civilized. You don't even have to make these excuses since you did try to prevent the pregnancy (by taking the plan b) and you weren't actively trying to become pregnant. I know how terrifying it will be to tell your parents, but your best bet is to be honest and tell them how you're going to deal with the situation. If they have a history of physical abuse, I would suggest that you do it with boyfriend around or a best friend just in case things get sticky. I wish you all the luck and get yourself to a doctor so he/she can help start you on the way to a healthy baby!

the earlier you tell your parents, the better.
they will have more time to accept the new life coming into the world, instead of you waddling in with a big belly and them putting two and two together.
Reptar gave you some good advice, like bring your boyfriend, a best friend..you could even tell your boyfriends parents first, and they could come with you to tell your parents. but like i said, the earlier the better.
My sister inlaw gave me that advice when i found out about my pregnancy, and in the long run, it helped and im glad i did it sooner than later.
My parents were disappointed, upset, angry..for alittle but they have come to accept this now.
Just stay calm when you tell them, dont fight with them, listen to what they have to say, and MAKE SURE you have a plan, because they WILL ask you that. Like what you are going to do, how you will support the baby, all questions like that. If you can answer all their questions honestly, it might make them accept it alittle more because you two are being responsible now, knowing what has to be done, and taking it from there.
Talk to your doctor, and pray for the best, plan b will not do any harm to your baby, its just hormones, and you body gets a TON when your pregnant. lol
If you feel like this is going to halt things, or be too much, you do have an option of adoption, if you would consider that..its not a bad thing, but another option for you.
Remember you can always have a baby when you feel you are ready. but thats just an option, like Reptar said, many women on here have succesfully raised their babies as a teen, and many are about to as well, they can give you support and possibly even the courage to do so.

good luck

Well, last night I was very confused about what I wanted to do and suggested the idea of possibly getting an abortion with my boyfriend. At this suggestion, he absolutely lit up, which honestly bothered me.
Now I know that I cannot destroy the life of what is currently growing inside me, and when I told him I am looking towards adoption (I mean we have a few weeks to decide, so I am still trying to weigh everything out), he got really upset. Before he told me he would support whatever I choose, but now he's telling me about he isn't ready and how we can't afford to even HAVE the baby. He is not pro keeping it. At all.
I am trying to be as open minded to his feelings as possible. I mean, he's scared, he's nervous about telling his parents, and he has a really crappy job as a waiter and I'm having trouble just finding a part-time job at the mall. I know that eventually his parents would be happy to offer some financial support but he has his mind made up that abortion is the only route, and since I'm not 18 yet, he is suggesting very ridiculous home methods which I would never be able to follow through with. He keeps telling me that this is not Juno, we can't just have a baby and expect all the expenses to be paid for. I told him planned parenthood is practically free.

I am stuck. I really am. If I was 18 and could get an abortion I might follow through with a more humane method, but even still I don't want to destroy something that people spend years and years trying to create without avail. I am scared he will leave me, though he says that's ridiculous. ...

I don't know anymore. At first I was sortof excited at our little accident and now I'm just scared and confused.

If you're not comfortable with the idea of abortion, don't let him pressure you into getting one. That's a choice that you're going to live with for the rest of your life, and if you get one without knowing it was the right thing to do, it will probably plague you for years.

I do think you should sit down with his parents though and discuss this. They might have a different perspective on this that you haven't thought of yet. They might know of some programs for young mothers that could help pay for pregnancy expenses or might be able to help you get on Medicaid if you qualify. And if you're leaning towards adoption, maybe they can help you figure that out, too.

Most importantly, maybe they can help you break the news to your own parents. It might be safer doing it with someone else at your side, since you've mentioned your parents have been physical in the past.

If you want to put it up for adoption a lot of times the adoptive parents will cover your medical expenses. I do think it is a good idea if you are set on having this child and you don't think you are ready. You can choose an open adoption and they will send you updates or you can set guidelines and even visit.

Taking the pills the wrong way wont have amade a difference, plan b does not affect a pregnancy that has already begun and unfortunately no contraceptive is 100% so it can happen even when you try to prevent it.



This is not his decision to make, if you're uncomfortable with abortion then there are other options. However, being 18 does not mean you wouldn't be able to obtain one should you decide on that option and "home remedies" are dangerous and should not be attempted.

Give yourself some time to think through what you want and don't pressure yourself into making a decision through fear or to please your bf. It's natural to be confused about this, do you have anyone else you can confide in?

Whatever you do, do not do a home remedy. They can be very dangerous and end up sending you to the hospital.

If you are worried about your age, I believe you can get an abortion at planned parenthood being under 18 without parental consent.

However, that being said, don't get an abortion unless if you are POSITIVE that's what you want, and not just what he wants. This is not something you want to regret for the rest of your life.

Good luck hun, I hope things work out.

Have you found out how far along you are yet?

i think i can understand where your boyfriend is coming from, a baby is expensive, and a part time job wont cut it, the average cost for a baby is between $30,000 and $40,000 and i wouldnt be surprised if its a little more than that.
Dont just act on abortion because he wants it. He cant force you to get one, you decide in the end. You could give the baby up for adoption to a loving family that can provide all the necessities for your child, and like someone else said on here, have an open adoption.
Maybe you could talk to an adoption agency, see what they can offer you.

this is a public forum, get over it. Retarded is a word. It sounds bad because people use it poorly in other terms but there is nothing wrong with how she is using it.

thank you.
this was cleared up long before you commented about it.
i understand, so theres no need to go into more depth about it.