That sounds pretty scary. However, I don't have any advice for you other than to call a local psychiatrist and explain to them over the phone (you don't have to give them your name) what you just told us. They may be able to help you make sense of it more, without judging you. I am sorry I'm not much help. I hope you get it figured out before something bad happens. Best of luck.

I have taken a few classes dealing with paranoid Schizophrenia. First of all, you are not alone. Many people have symptoms of Schizophrenia and are able to lead successful and fulfilling lives. The symptoms usually are apparent at a very young age.

Schizophrenia can be dealt with by taking medicine and although the treatment may not eliminate paranoia, or hallucinations, it can significantly assist you in rationalizing reality and what is real and how to deal with it.

Talk to someone you trust. Maybe your parents can take you to a doctor, but you said earlier the you were having problems with them, so maybe an older sibling, a school counselor; someone who will support you and will not try to talk you out of believing you are having these symptoms. I would say you have a good chance of being diagnosed for Schizophrenia but you don't need to be afraid of being put into a mental institution or anything like that. You will probably be referred by your doctor to go to a Psychiatrist. Psychiatrists are like therapists who have certification to prescribe prescriptions for their patients.

I am glad you are taking the initiative to find out more about your mental health and are proactively seeking help.

I wish you all the best.

P.S. There is a Doctor of Mathematics by the name of John Forbes Nash Jr. He is a Nobel Prize winner. You may have seen the movie, "A Beautiful Mind." This movie is based on John Nash's life and is a true story. You may find hope in watching it. The leading actor is Russel Crowe. Mr. Nash, is a victim and survivor of a very bad case of Schizophrenia and with the support of friends and family, he was able to overcome his mental hardships and teach at Princeton University.

Here's a link to a site to learn more about him:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Forbes_N ash,_Jr.

I don't think that you are illogically paranoid at all.

Believe or not, there is alot of watching going on.
They are always watching people aren't they.

I was thinking about this the other night, how children especially do things like close the closet door or cover their feet while sleeping, could be something more to that that goes beyond just little kids being imaginitive.


My main point was though, that we aren't alone, we are usually never alone, and there are plenty of beings that yes want you dead, I've actually met them before. I don't think that it's your imagination or your mind running wild. Perhaps only fear, possibly terror. But caused by the truth of the matter, we are being watched, and they are bad.

I wish I could explain to you in full.
You may just be more aware than others.
To be comfortable or feel as if you are safe is an old wives tale you might say.

Hey,
Okay, so I have a friend who is schitzophrenic. He was diagnosed with it the summer of his 16th year. For him, he hears voices telling him to hurt himself and others, they are always putting him down, and constantly making him parinoid. Telling him that people are watching him, and that nothing is real. It sounds to me like you have most of the same "symptoms" as he has and did. The only diffrence I see is that he does EVERYTHING out there, as in he smokes everything, he is a frequent drinker, and i know for a fact he does marjuana and X. I know he self-injures too, but so do I.
It worries me greatly, because it is also getting worse. And I am almost positive it is because he does all of these recreational substances. He is becoming more suicidal everyday.
But it sounds to me like you are as well, but you sound much stronger than most people I know with struggles or confusion and depression and what not.
I know that it would help if you got some medication. That would help with the anxieties and the depression. But you would have to tell your parents if you want medical help. Haha, dont worry hun, im in the same boat with you on that one. : )
I've done a lot of research on various things with this on my own time, plus my best guy friend has schitzo. So I really would love to talk to you if you'd like.
Also, I'm going to be 16 in a matter of weeks, so hey! If you want to talk to someone your own age, well here you go! : )
Hope to hear from you, and you can private message me if you'd like to keep our conversations more private.(that is, if you'd like to start talking)
I hope I have been of some help, and if not hope to be of some help in the future.
Gracie : )