I been feeling very down and depressed for severl years now, i do not know the exact cause but i have some Ideas:

The girl ive loved for 5 years hating me.
Knowing if my mates will still like me when i get back to school.
living with a family that you don't love.

I have told many people about how i feel all of them friends, all of them say i can go to them for help but i just can't they will make fun of me because thats what there like. I can't tell my parents of family because they will just poke fun at it, they have this thign called "Banter" which is more pick on me. I tried telling them once but they just said to get over it it will go in time. I have never thought about hurting myself although if im holding a knfie my mind tells me to cut myself, although i don't want to, so i usaly put the knife down and walk off.
I don't really know what i want, it may just be somoen to talk to but when im crying myself to sleep i iwll just wake my parents up and tell them im ill or something so then i have somone there aswell.
I need your advice is there anyway to get round this without telling anyone?