Sexual Health - Women Forum

Womens Health > Sexual Health - Women Forum > Orgasm method

We burp, belch and fart an average of 12 times a day. But why do we have gas? And what is intestinal gas?...the basics here....

Q: Orgasm method

asked by: allister on June 17th, 2009

New User

I never used to be able to orgasm at least as a teenager, and was finally able to come with a partner about two years ago. The only way that I've found I can do it is to lay back and be totally relaxed while having my clit stimulated and holding my breath the entire time.

I've been with a new guy for about three months now, and I really want to be able to come with him, but I am afraid that he will feel weirded out by the fact I have to hold my breath and that it must be a seperate thing from intercourse and may take a few minutes to achieve. It's very hard for me to become comfortable as it is, and he has showed some slight interest in learning how to make me come, as far as every once in awhile I'll get a couple seconds attention from him on my clit. Unfortunatly I think he expects that I just start rubbing myself down during intercourse and will come in a few seconds or so, but I just can't seem to focus. I tried to touch myself once while we were having sex, and it felt like next to no sensation on my clit. I have never been able to come via gspot either.

I'm just not sure how to go about having this conversation with him, or trying it or what. I don't want him to be too judgemental or just totally give up, you know?

Replies(4)

susan862003

replied on June 18th, 2009

Extremely eHealthy

If you do not tell him how to make you orgasm, he will never work this one out by himself. Guys does not understand how to do it as they are used to a few rubs and viola, they orgasm. Maybe you can show him how you do it for yourself and he can learn from that. Guys normally find this very exciting, even if it is weird to us.

I am sure he wants to please you as much as you want to please him and any help you could give him will be appreciated. If he does not want to do it, it might be time to move on to somebody that care enough for you.

I must admit I have never heard of the "holding your breath the entire time" trick. Women need tension to build up in their genitals and body to orgasm. Orgasm is the release of this tension. The fact that you say that you are totally relaxed may be part of the problem. Having an orgasm means allowing this tension to build up and concentrating on it to ensure that it continues to build. The holding of your breath is probably your way to build up the tension.

I hope this is not an early form of autoerotic asphyxiation. This is very dangerous as David Carrandine's death recently showed.

allister

replied on June 19th, 2009

New User

No no, I don't strangle myself or anything. I just hold my breath, and when I feel light headed I let it out and take another.
It's easier for me to concentrate on the sensation, and I've never been able to come without doing it.

kaylahop

replied on June 19th, 2009

New User

i used to have problems making love with my husband...I never had an orgasm until after having my daughter. I found that being on top and in control of the motions and speed with nipple stimulation and making lots of noise, i have amazing orgasms. When on top you are able to rub your clit on his body. give that a try. You just need to let go and have fun making love...best of luck...youll find your way...it took me 8 yrs to figure out how to have an orgasm during sex :)itll come Smile

ServiceU

replied on June 19th, 2009

Supporter

kaylahop,
it's weird that you would say that because i watched real sex on HBO and a women said that if she rides her boyfriend that she is guaranteed an orgasms. i knew what she was talking about because that was the only way i can orgasm during sex.
and to explain it is
while your b/f is lying down and your riding him, you usually go up and down, but when you come down on him try also going in a sweeping motions which will allow your clit to rub against his pelvic bone. this feels like masturbation and eventually if your doing it right you will have a orgasm so deep you will see stars.
this takes practice and my ex and i only had sex in that position for three years, b/c that was the only one that worked for us.

Learn About Us

Get Help

Join In

Do More

We comply with the HONcode standard for trustworthy health
information:
verify here.

The site is not a replacement for professional medical opinion, examination, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of your medical doctor or other qualified health professional before starting any new treatment or making any changes to existing treatment. Do not delay seeking or disregard medical advice based on information written by any author on this site. No health questions and information on eHealth Forum is regulated or evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration and therefore the information should not be used to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease without the supervision of a medical doctor. Posts made to these forums express the views and opinions of the author, and not the administrators, moderators, or editorial staff and hence eHealth Forum and its principals will accept no liabilities or responsibilities for the statements made. Schizophrenia health sitemap.
This page was last updated on January 1, 2009.
© 2008 eForums, Inc