Hi, well i've been going over the facts in my head many times and while most people reassure me that i should be fine, i'm still paranoid about possibly being infected. here's the story.
about 3 months ago i went on a trip and during this trip i engaged in unprotected oral sex with 2 people (both male, and i'm a male as well), there was no exchange of semen, and it didn't last more than probably half an hour. the next morning, being the paranoid that i am, i got scared that i could possibly be infected and started screaming at myself as to why i was so careless.
so i went to take a shower, tried to calm down and low and behold i have a minor scratch on my penis! this made me go crazy again, i mean i know there was no semen involved but now there was blood!
so first thing i do is call an AIDS hotline and i was reassured that i was most likely fine. they said that unless the person who gave me head had a bleeding wound in his mouth, then there was probably no chance of me getting infected. they told me that just for my reassurance i could get tested in 3 months (which i'm about to do in a week or two).
during this whole time tho, i didn't get sick or anything, which i took as a good thing because i read that sometimes after infection people get fevers, colds, and such... i felt completely healthy.
now i'm freaking out again because again i had unprotected oral sex with another guy, and this time there was ejaculation but not in the mouth. it happened twice the same night, which means that the second time there might have been traces of semen on his penis. the second time happened a few hours after the first (which i would assume be enough time for the virus to die outside of the body, especially in dry semen). the next morning i woke up, and again i had a scratch. as far as i know tho, this guy, who is friends with my friend is fine.
however, i'm still freaking out about the whole thing. and now i hate that i would have to wait another 3 months to get tested again. i've been considering an RNA test, but most people think i'm just being crazy and that i shouldn't even worry because my risk of actually getting infected is so small.
now i'm more paranoid than ever. every single thing that happens i think is a symptom. my throat hurt a bit the other day, i had green snot for a day or two, i feel like my penis itches, i had loose stool. could all of this just be my nerves?
what should i do? what are my risks? anybody's been through something similar? what can i do to calm down? what test should i get and when? i guess i just really need reassurance that i shouldn't loose sleep over this, and that i should just stay calm and get tested in due time.
You have done well to come looking for help. I think most of it is nerves. Every time we engaged in sex or most times, there are little cuts and tears that happen in or on the sex organ. You are only noticing these because you are looking for them.
Glad to hear you called the AIDS hot line. They were right but for your own peace of mind, you need to get tested as you have arranged. And then wait another three months and get tested again. Quit having unprotected sex. My personal preference is the blood test. It does not leave you wondering if you have the virus or not. And that is why you need two tests. Doctor catches 98% of the people in the first test but there is a 2% who don't turn positive until six months from the point of supposed infection.
If your penis is itchy, you should see a doctor and ask to be tested for other STD's as well.
What ever is is and nothing you can change mbae worrying. Go for the test and keep busy with other things like hobbies while you wait for the results.
I have had AIDS for over 15 years and I am still here and still going strong. This is not the end of the world. Life goes on.
Don't worry about what people are saying that you are crazy. This is your life and you must take charge of it.
It does not mean a person has no AIDS or STD if he is a friend of a friend.
Oral sex with a condom isn't as good...after all it has a different flavor...I cant believe I said that..You can always have a different kind of oral sex...licking the shaft and balls and such with out touching fluid and that should be safe and still give you what you are hot for..I cant believe I am talking like this but I don't know how else to put it...but anyway, I have also had AIDS for several years and Mson is right...life goes on.It changes but it is still great...good luck..let us hear how you are.