I just told my boyfriend that i am sick. I've had a pretty stressful life and since meeting him 2 years ago he has helped me a great deal but i hid this from him because it is my last big struggle to self healing (i've been bulimic now for just over 4 years - severe for 3). But i don't know how he feels it is almost as if he doesn't want to know about it. I've been trying really hard to be good but i freak out as soon as i put on even a kilo and i can't control myself. I originally lost 50kg by exercising and limiting my daily kilo joule intake but then i got out of it and being sick was so much easier. So I'm fearing that he is going to walk out on me and its ruining all the hard work i've done in the last 2 years to be happy within myself because he is the love of my life and if he goes i don't know if i'll have the strength to carry on anymore. I read a post on here about a guy who left his gf because she didn't want to help herself and i'm so worried that is going to be me that i can't even sleep. His body language has been very insincere and as we just moved interstate a month ago i am completely alone excluding him. We've been living together for over 18 months and i can't imagine my life without him in it. Please help me control myself, i want to get better but my relationship with food has been so negative my entire life that i don't think i've ever been normal