Hi tinkin,

I'm sorry to hear that you're going through some rough times. When we're not decided about what steps to take and live in ambiguity...it's painful! Do you have anyone to talk to about this?

Hi, I'm so worried about you right now.
do you want to talk a bit more about it? Please, let me know *

Hey,
im around, im so far maitaining the weight i reached, i had to quit my job due to childcare problems andi gaineda tad but then i lost it. I havent purged in a couple weeks though! i still ahte my body but i also know that no matter what i prob wont be happy ill find a flaw somewhere. Im gah im seriously entrapped in this eating disorder and i cant let it go, not yet, i want it , im not skinny enough, i know it sound sstupid but its the truth, im not happy not yet. but in reality i have 2 kids and a family and i doubt ill ever be happy with mybody i just need to learn to be comfortable with it.
But also we are probably movign back stateside in about 3-4mths so i can get better help there if need be, im really tryin to do this on my own though.
I just feel lost and confused........

You are such a great woman: you take care of your children, you keep running the house smoothly! This you can't forget: your children need you - healthy...

hugs... I'm sorry you feel this way...

I'm glad to hear you haven't purged within a few weeks. I'll give you a few suggestions of what my doctor had me do when I had an ED...

1 - Sit in front of a mirror (I know it sounds stupid) but say ''I'm beautiful in my own way'' as many times as you need to until you believe it.

2 - Sit in front of a mirror and find the good points (not the bad) and take pride in the good parts of you.

There was a few more, but I can't remember them just at the minute. Remember you're not alone, you have us for support. I'm glad to hear you're maybe considering help when you move, but is there anywhere you would consider some help temporarily? If you get the problem sorted quickly, it's easier to recover. (Although, recovery is always possible.)

Hope this helps... PM me if you need anything...

Cheryl x

well over here there isnt anyone qualified in this particular area. We have the base clinic wich is just primary care physicians, not real pyshologists or anything of that sort. In 2004 i was in therapy for a year for the ED, I was threatened with hospitalization if i had kept on losing weight but i managed to not go IP. Last time though i wasnt really overweight or anthing at all when i was starving etc. This time i went from a larger weight to one more normal to my height just not in the normal matter so i think the difference is the damage it can do going from a higher weight then starting out at a lower one and doing these things. I want to recover but i just dont wanna get fat. I still am fat right now and im right around the high end of the average weight for my height but this weight isnt good enough for me i need it lower. I stand on the scale sooo much all day everyday and i always look in the mirror and critique my body and the fat etc. Its just a never ending cycle. I was in recovery from about jan 05 to march 08. But i was pregnant twice in those times. being pregnant with my kids is what kept me eating normal but once i had them i hated my body. Im suprised i went that far doing so well i had my daughter dec 06,

I'm sure you'll overcome that. Talk to me or call me to IM whenever you want to. Btw, how's it between you and your husband? Is he still away? Remember: you CAN be healthy!*

me and thus husband are doing well, he came back in decembe rlast yr, he injured his back down there. So far ive been doing well . Maintaining the weight i am currently at.

Glad to hear that you are together again get better, girl!

yeah i dunno, when im happier i eat more normal, then when im depressed it all seems to fall apart, i go back to the ED to handle life. just how things seem to run. But so far all is well in the house. I still struggle witht he food daily and freakin out and weighin myself constantly but ah not to much longer till im in the states again!