I feel extremely weird, is the right way to put it. I feel as though I don't know who I am and that scares the hell out of me. I think i'm going crazy sometimes. I can't think clearly and my thoughts are in the back of my mind. When you speak it doesn't feel like your speaking. Everything around you looks a bit hazy or unreal/surreal, like when you're high on a sunny day. You feel you care less about the world and even the ones u love the most, and that hurts you deep inside.
You feel NO ONE understands your problem and you feel as though the problem will last forever and the world will never be the same it was.
You get highs and lows... lows are the most excruciating times of the day, you just feel like crying and crumbling away deep into your self-pity.. highs are a time of feeling positive and optimistic, and hope invigorates you and gives your world a bit more meaning and life!
You feel so confused, and you can't seem to get a grasp on the world or it's meaning, etc etc etc. And the cycle goes on and as time passes the problem gets worst!
If this is anything how anyone feels.. please tell me. I just hope I'm not alone and not going crazy, and hope that this is simply stress/anxiety and will eventually go away.
Hi, I can relate to how your feeling. I have that same feeling right now. Its been like this for the last two months. At first, the feeling really, really worried me. But then I joined this forum and realized that many other people were experiencing the same thing I am. Thats why I like this forum so much. I basically feel very lightheaded, and it feels like I am detached from myself when I am walking. I don't know if this is called depersonalization or derealization. I know that this is a classic anxiety/depression symptom. I just try to ignore it now, hoping that it will go away! I hope you feel better.
Yeah, I'm only 14! And I have a feeling related to this! It comes and goes but when it happens it just scares the hell out of me, I feel just hot all over and I get really scared like im not me and I don't feel myself, it really really scares me very much! I hope you feel better
Thanks alot for your reply shannashaine... It does give me some hope to know that other people are experiencing the same feeling and that I am not crazy. I recently told my parents about it and my mom said that she had the exact same problem when she was in her early twenties. She said that when her psychiatrist told her that it was 100% curable she was able, from that point on, to improve and it eventually went away. I've come to figure that this derealisation/depersonalisation or whatever shrinks want to call it is a way for our brain to escape the depression/anxiety/stress we go through every day, every hour, every minute and every second of our life. It gives our brain a break from the excruciating damage stress can cause to it, and I think it is more a reaction of the soul, whether you want to believe in such a thing or not, rather than the physical brain.
Again, thank you for this forum and all the hope it gives to me and all the people in my situation or other hard situations. Peace to all!
im 17 and iv experienced this since i was 13 it comes and goes but is realy bad right now... and no1 could understand what this was... and i thank u for helping me undrstand that im not the only one out there fighting this
Hi Rocket,i'm new to this forum.it was your story that caught my eye and made me join to be honest,i haven't been suffering long with anxiety and panic,probably about 2 months,i am on medication to relieve the symptoms,which does work to some degree,But, i have been having a weird kind of detached from the world emotion as of late,i found difficult to put into words.but you my friend have just described it to a T.i have a sense of relief to be honest,but at the same time sadness,because i know you are feeling exactly how i do.and it isn't a nice place one bit,good luck friend, and i hope we can over come this state of anxious mind,coz lets face it,its the anxiety monster that's playing these mind games.
hi everbody , i am also going through the same thing i get scared all the time always thinking the worse i cry all the time , and i feel like im going crazy i have begged for help and always feel like im getting on ppls nerves by trying to talk to them about how im feeling ,, but if they havent been thru it i dont think they understand , i go numb have pains shake go dizzy feel sick and sometimes i dont even want to go out . i just feel like im trapped in closed doors . as anyone had to go thru this
i am so glad you joined this forum, i have a recent entry about how i feel very similar to what you have described. i have been feeling lightheaded and extremely depressed more and more over the past three months. it really gives me hope that others understand how i am feeling, i feel so so alone, unable to really express how i feel and what you have described sounds almost exactly how i have been feeling. i really hope you are able to get past it and know that you arent alone, i am here with you. please please talk to me whenever you want to.
~ all my love
You are very welcome Rocket111. I wish that the people I am constantly around-family,friends,co-workers; knew about anxiety/depression. Unfortunately none of them can relate to what I go through so I feel alienated. I have had severe anxiety attacks in the past. And every single time I had an attack, I would get the derealization feeling but for only about an hour. Then it would just subside. Now, its constant, even though I have not had any full blown panic attacks. I think my mind unconsciously went into protect mode. I am a person who is constantly worrying about everything, constantly stressing, over-analyzing, and it finally caught up with me. And even though its not coming out in the form of panic attacks, its coming out in the form of derealization/depersonalization. I noticed today that it seemed like I was looking through a haze all day. Its really weird! But I know I'm gonna be okay and you will be okay too.
Also, when I first started feeling like this, I scheduled a doctor's appt and had all this bloodwork done. I thought maybe I was ill or something. I was convinced that maybe I had low iron or some weird disease. Turns out that my tests came back fine.
And my doctor said that it had to be anxiety or depression.
I have felt the same exact way, but for quite some time now...about 2 years. I get highs and lows as well, which could swing massively to either direction several times a day even. Its comforting to know that I am not the only one. I have had no social life for the last while because of this. I get extremely awkward at times when talking to people and get that similar feeling that my mind has no control over the words...that I am just talking for the sake of going through the motions with everyday life, not because i WANT to talk to the person. Ive been alienating myself from everyone, including my family and loved ones and I feel so alone right now because I cant seem to bring my self to tell any of them. I've seen a counselor on and off but couldn't seem to find the words to describe my problem and hence, didn't get much out of it. I am going to make an appointment with the doctor tomorrow and when I see him, I will print off a copy of these posts and say "this is how i feel". I am so glad I found this website..thanks everyone!
Ive only just now searched about this, ive felt like this since i was 14 when my grandad died, went to the docs, had all the tests, everything fine, i was diagnosed with Derealization/Depersonalization/Stress/Anx
iety/Depression, this was early in 2008, almost 4 years after i started with it, 4 years later, i still feel the same, like theres nothing to get me out of this spiral, its like im in a tunnel in my own head but can't be free'd. I'm 18 now, i wish i was lieing, exadurating, but for 4 years i haven't felt the same as i used to, and i'd give anything to feel that way again, its like its not my choice anymore, i have to feel this way, somedays i feel better but its still there, always there. But it does help to know there are others out there the same as me i have to admit, im glad i found this place.
Hey Rocket, I just wanted to let you know that I am experiencing the same symptoms as you. I had no idea what they were, totally thought I was going to end up in an institution. I can't believe there isn't more information out there on this disoder. Even when I tried to explain it to my councellor she told me she's never heard of this and made me feel even worse. I find what really helps is calling this for what it is, facing it, do not allow this to facinate you, try to find something meaningful in your life and live for that. I also find talking to ppl who understadnw ha you are going though really helps. I am always avaibale and more than happy to talk if you would like please add me to msn or skype. my email is valentine(underscore)swe85(at)hotmail(dot)
com.Sorry I know thats confusing but I have to spell it like that otherwirse it will be removed from the post.
iam so relieved to have found this site, i honestly thought i was alone in this.. i have had all of the above symptoms throughout my life, but it comes and goes..the first time it happened i was 17 and it lasted for maybe a year,then it went away and then it started again when i was 20 and lasted about another year this last time it started a year and a half ago..i was in nursing school and had one of those horrible panic attacks,i usually can move on from them and not let it get to me,but this time i dwelled on it and thought about all the things that could be wrong with me over and over again which sent me into this state again of feeling weird and not myself..anyway im working on trying to beat it again..and i just want to thank all of you for talking about this so i know im not alone..please let me know how you all are doing latley and if you have found away to overcome this...thankyou all!!!
Hello, I am a 35 yo male whos been going through these type of feelings for the past 4 years.. At first(when I was 31) I too just thought there was something wrong like I was getting sick, but then the feelings turn into fainting like episodes with mild chest pain so I went to the ER where everything check out fine.. They said I was just stressed... A year went by and I would document the feelings.. The feeling would be on & off every few days for about a 1 MONTH and then two months I would be fine.. This cycle went on for one year intill I started having PANIC attacks.. So now instead of feeling just really weird, light headed, out of my body, floating, etc this was REPLACED with constant anexity. The anxiety would get worse when I would drive by myself, fly, in a steam shower(like I cant breath), gt into a argument(like i would hyperventlate), over eat , or anything that would cause abnormal strain on my body.. Te anxiety was managable, but it would turn to PANIC attacks that WAS NOT manageable.. It was weird because I would have constant anxiety daily, then it would turn into a 2-5 mintues of panic attacks once a week.. After a month would pass everything kinda went away for the next month or two.. It would eventually start all over gain.. I have only seen regular medical doctors(cardiologist, general, ER) I have not seen any phys docs which would probably give me LEXAPRO, XANAX, etc... The people I have met you got on these meds have said they are wonderful, but I just hate to start them.. Sometimes I am such a mess I think the MEDS ould give m a panic attack... Oh well Just wanted to share what I have been through the pass few years and it has not got any better... This year I have gone into a HEALTH CRAZE... Work out, EAT great, no artificial sugars, no hydro foods, and etc.. I feel GREAT when its not a MONTH of ANXIETY, but when it is the eating right and etc really does not help.. Somethings I find that do help is:
1) When you KNOW u are having a month of anxiety stay away from certain things that cause your body stress. Because this cause bring on a bad PANIC ATTACK
2) If u are having a PANIC attack where u cant breath well just tell yourself "Hell there are other people breathing the SAME AIR and they are not dying
3) When u are having breathing problem DRINK SIPS of COLD water between breaths.. This helps me when I am driving.
4) Have a love one massage your hands while u lay down.. This helps alot..
I notice when I have a PANIC ATTACK my BLOOD PRESSURE goes up to 160-170 over 90 and my pulse is like 90-110.. When I lie down and have my hands massage within 30minutes my BLOOD PRESSURE drops to 130 over 70 and pulse comes to 70.. Though this works when I lay down and fall asleep.. If anyone ever wants to chat feel free to email me..
dax 0007 at hotmail . cOm
I have been having very similar feelings on and off for the past 2 years. I am 21 years old and in my senior year of college. I have had a lot of trouble describing my feelings to people close to me. All I would say is, "I feel weird. I don't feel myself." After reading these posts, it clicked. I also feel lightheaded and disconnected from the world. I find myself listening to what others are saying, but I also find that I don't care. I don't feel comfortable with people that I used to have fun with and laugh easily around. I sometimes find myself smiling and then think to myself, "I didn't think that was funny." I seem to be smiling or laughing only because others around me are smiling or laughing. I have been able to snap myself out of these feelings for a couple days or weeks at a time, but the feelings always creep back in.
I am a firm believer in positive thoughts and natural methods over medication. I think I would like to start therapy for these symptoms.
I want to let everyone know, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I am glad I found this site and glad to know that others are feeling like me.
I'm much younger than most of you here, well I guess not that much younger. I don't really pay attention to how long I've been feeling..not myself..but lately I just can't stand most of my friends, and I don't like them..but I do like them..and I want to be with them..I just feel like..it's not me..and I try to tell them that, but I bet they think I'm crazy. I don't know what I have, if it's anxiety or if I have anything..all I know is that I need help, and I'm desperate. It's weird though, because these feelings are usually when I'm in a large crowd of people, or a public place, like school, or the mall. I don't get as excited as I use to..which kills me. I just want to be able to enjoy my life, can't I just save these feelings for when I'm older..? I'll get depressed sometimes when I'm alone, but the whole, detached from the world feeling, is whenever I'm in public, sometimes I'm fine, other times I'm not..I don't know what's going on..help anyone?
I am 21 and in college right now and I'm pretty sure u just described my symptoms spot on. I am also normally a good student and currently find it extremely hard to comprehend simple topics and it takes me way longer than normal to complete simple tasks. Just feels like I'm not functioning correctly.
I've had these feelings before one 2 occasions when I did drugs and had a panic attack.
I've found that the best thing that work for me is...prozac. I resisted taking meds for a long time, as I was scared they would change me, afraid it meant I was a freak, opposed to the idea, etc...
Then I finally caved and took prozac. Within 2 weeks the depersonalization was gone. With 6 weeks I felt like myself again. It may not help everyone, but there is no need to suffer through this out of principle. Get some therapy, and for God's sake get some medicine! The combination of both healed me.
I am truly sorry that people have had to go through this but I am happy I am not alone. I don't think my symptoms are too bad. I do suffer from feeling unlike my usual self. I had a traumatic experience at work that has sent me into tailspin. I have decided that I will not sucuumb to it. So through willpower, exercise, accupuncture, raw foods diet and maybe a bit of psychotherapy, I will be back to normal. I refuse to accept this for the rest of my life. I pray that more people here will fight this thing. You are not alone and we can do this.
Love and Respect. Jamaican Girl.
I,m 45 and have been feeling much the same on and off for about 2 years.
It all started 'just like that' when i developed a strange phobia of not being able to go out alone.
Since then i,ve felt ''odd'' ''out of sorts' somedays and extremly depressed.
I also suffer panick attacks but discovered a little trick that seems to help me, i don't know why it works (for me anyway) but give it a try it's harmless unless your allergic to sugar.
When i feel panicky i suck on a strong mint and take sips of water inbetween, and i have no idea how it works for me but it does help calm me down a heck of a lot. Try it!
Pity i doesn't do the same for my phobia of going out LOL
Now and then when those rare good days come along it's a great feeling and i think to myself 'oh! i,m better'!
But of course the 'out of sorts' feeling keeps coming back again and the spiral continues.
Like some of you i can,t be bothered with people (even my own family) and it takes a lot of effort for me to go see them even though my hubby takes me there and back. Everything seems to 'bore' me, and yet i can't seem to do anything about it. Most days everything seems an such an effort (even getting dressed ect)
I used to love doing my hair and make-up each day, but thses days i just throw a brush through it or on very rare occasions when i HAVE to go out i put a hat on and haven't used make-up for a long time...whats the point? it takes to long to do all that just to sit round the house
With Xmas coming up my anxiety is increasing because of 'family get togethers' and other parties, the thought terrifies me as it means having to 'bother' to make an effort to socialize, when i really do not relish the though one bit!!
No one knows this (other than my hubby)....oh and you guys now! LOL. I don't feel i can talk to my family or what little friends i have left (due to me alienating them all) I used to go out to work, go shopping meet friends ect ect.... now i have to do PT work from home cuz i,m scared to go out.
Was offered prozac a long time ago from doc but i didn't want to become dependant on drugs to get me through the day so didn't take them and never will.
So now i just learn to live with it, and some days are good and others not so good.
One thing that HAS helped me (even though this means i need to get out) is.....
My hubby bought us a caravan, and WOW! we go away some weekends coz i only have to go in the car (as far as the drive) haha....then land on campsite and sit inside van and look out onto different surroundings. It's even had me walking YES walking! along the beach with hubby and it felt SOOOOO exhilarating to do that.
Maybe somewhere inside, there is something awaiting you all too, and you are able to find that escape from time to time from the hum drum of everyday life....i truly hope you all some day find it.
I'm so glad i found this site, it really has made me feel almost instantly better just knowing i,m not alone and we can keep chatting to like minded people with similar issues. This is the first time i'v ever spoke about it (hence the long post sorry) LOL
I wish you all the very best and i,m here to chat if anyone needs a friend (As long as you don't want me to come out and play!) hehehe
hey i get the same sort of feeling, its horrible, i thought my life was lost forever. but i definitely have ups and downs.
the worst thing about it is the look on peoples faces when they see me i hate it, i hate people reacting to me in a bad way, and it makes me feel way worse. i just get this sinking feeling when i see people look at me, and then completely unemotional.
i feel like im losing myself completely, like this problem will always stay with me even if i stop it for a period of time. like im marked. the only problem i had before this started to happen was some social anxiety, but now i feel like im not myself and i will never be who i was originally. i wont ever be fully happy. like im stuck with this horrible self forever. i know its a horrible way to think but i cant think otherwise, because im not a thick-skinned person, im very sensitive.
If you identify with several of the following signs and symptoms, and they just wonât go away, you may be suffering from an anxiety disorder.
* Are you constantly tense, worried, or on edge?
* Does your anxiety interfere with your work, school, or family responsibilities?
* Are you plagued by fears that you know are irrational, but canât shake?
* Do you believe that something bad will happen if certain things arenât done a certain way?
* Do you avoid everyday situations or activities because they make you anxious?
* Do you experience sudden, unexpected attacks of heart-pounding panic?
* Do you feel like danger and catastrophe are around every corner?
I'm glad (once again)there are others out there besides me. The very first post on here, is almost word for word how I feel. I have stopped anwering my phone on my bad days so I don't go off on my friends that are still around. I'm down to just one good day a week if I'm so lucky. The bed is my best friend, and my husband waits till I'm sleeping before coming to bed at night. Though this past month, I'm up all night and sleep mostly during the day. I can't really drive anymore thinking someone is going to hit me, and when my husband drives(who has a CDL, and has had it since he was 1 I freak out. I have been trying different meds for the past 4 months. But with that comes the withdrawel of one and time for the other to start takening effect. It just really sucks like your in a black-hole and just keep falling with no way out.