no point in having goals since i wont achive them anyway

hey i know the feeling and i am depressed. all u really need is some close friend suppoort. and with time it gets better just try to stay focused

Been there and sympathize. Life can seem hopeless, but it does get better. This worked for me (and everyone is different), but based on my success I suggest that you (1) find a therapist immediately, it can take time to find a good one, don't give up (2) you need to completely change your thinking, from dwelling on everything negative to focusing on anything positive, everyone has something, (3) YOU NEED FRIENDS may be difficult but you need to find a social group, you also need close family for support (4) if your boyfriend isn't helping and you feel no love, then end it now and move on to working on yourself (5) tell yourself it will get better BECAUSE IT DOES, when at the bottom, you can only go up (6) find hobbies, you need to stay active and find things that you can enjoy and focus your attention. All I can say is that I felt exactly like you several times in my life, and managed to turn it completely around. It was hard, never thought it would be possible, but I did it. DONT GIVE UP! You deserve to be happy too!