Hi All, this is my first post here so please go easy on me!
I am doing this as a bit of an act of desperation and I am particularly keen to hear from any females who have experience of my issues.
I am 41 years old, my 37 year old wife and I have been married 9 years and together for 15. I am her only lover and we have 3 fabulous kids.
Following the birth of our 3rd child we didn’t have sex for a long time and during this time I was trying but my wife was not so keen and I guess I eventually gave up trying (complacent I know). But we were all happy aside from this and things were rosy.
Since our child was born I have changed jobs and got a huge payrise, this has meant that some of the debts I previously had are gone. My wife was not aware of these as she does worry a lot and it was a difficult time when she did find out. But I felt this was behind us as we were definitely making good inroads on finding financial security.
About 3 months ago my wife said one morning ‘I am really in the mood for love!’ Well you can imagine my response I was sooooo excited and couldn’t wait! We had a kiss and touching session when the kids weren’t around during the day and neither of us could wait for the kids to go to bed!
When the moment arrived it was amazing. It was very sensuous and we both climaxed intensely. We both agreed it had been far too long. We had some amazing love making and during this time I felt like I was on cloud 9. I was successful at work, had a great family and my wife that I adore couldn’t keep her hands off me!
Then about 6 weeks ago it all came to a halt for no apparent reason. During these last 6 weeks I have felt exactly the same in that I tell her she looks fab all the time and I tell her I love her at every chance. These are 2 things I have not done on a regular basis for too long. She is confused and concerned by my sudden interest in her but as I now have no secrets I feel like the world has been lifted off my shoulders.
About 10 days I was awoken by her shuffling a lot in her sleep. I believed at the time she was masturbating and this was a shock to say the least. I could feel rhythmic movement in the bed and her breathing patterns gave off all the signs she was preparing to orgasm which she duly did with a very muffled moan. I was lying there in a state of shock as one of my ultimate fantasies was happening right next to me!
I said and did nothing. The next night I managed to not sleep and exactly the same thing happened again. I grabbed myself and began to gently stroke myself at which point she stopped to ask if I was masturbating, I replied no but I did say ‘I thought you were?’ She flat denied this and no more was said on the matter. This did continue a few more nights which resulted in me not getting much sleep as I was extremely anxious about the whole thing. I know women need to have ‘their’ time but why do it right next to me when she knows I am extremely keen on making love to her and why deny it?
Anyways move forward a few more nights and I was lying with my hand across her stomach as she lay on her back in bed. I was waiting to see what would happen and after about 10 minutes she placed her arm on top of mine and began to rythmically move her arm. I left my arm really still and despite feeling like my heart was shaking the whole house I managed to not distract her. This continued for about 5 minutes until I gently moved and whispered ‘let me join in.’ She got very cross and said my behaviour was really annoying. She then rolled over and after a short while the movement continued.
The following morning she told me she doesn’t masturbate as if she does feel horny she will simply ask me. Good news I thought but then the very next night we are in the same position and she rolls on to her side and then reaches around to touch herself again. About 20 mins of gentle sighing and laboured breathing she muffles quietly and then raises her hand to her mouth.
I am lying there thinking to myself what am I doing wrong?
I would not consider myself unattractive but I guess I must be to her at the moment as she is shunning all of my advances and get herself off with me lying right beside her.
She is not very good at talking about sex and would not ever do so in public as she would get very embarrassed, so if I were to suggest us sharing it and doing it together she would probably think I am being a pervert and continue to deny she does it.
How do I bring it up in conversation?
What might she be thinking about me to lie there jilling herself off right beside me?
Saving 