I don't know where the line is drawn. Yesterday my husband and I were at a beach party (Newport) and there were like a thousand sexy girls in their bikinis, he stared at them all he wanted, I would sometimes make a comment about a super big pair of tits. Today, we are sitting in bed working on our laptops and all of sudden when I looked he started closing the windows. I asked to see what it was and found that it was him searching for videos of "hot girls" on youtube. It is one thing to look at beautiful/sexy or provocatively dressed women when they are right in front of you but for him to actively engage in online searches looking for hot girls makes me wonder what makes him do that. I told him on a prior occasion that I don't care if he looks but I feel that this action of him being guilty is reflective of how he may not be attracted to me anymore.
I get plenty stares myself from others, and even though I find it rude of the guy doing the staring and being disrespectful to his wife/girlfriend he is with, I don't over react if my guy looks at other women, just because doing so would be out of jealousy. But this episode of him actively searching for pictures and videos of hot girls when he is apparently "bored" is something I feel like a conscious effort to please his lust senses. What is he thinking? Please help with your opinions.

P.S- He has agreed (on my initiative)not to watch porn and says he hasn't done so in months. he swore by it when I asked him today.

my opinion would be a little bias because i look at porn with my boyfriend once in a blue moon.
i think staring for a long time at women is wrong. like i said i know how you feel because my ex did this and he treated me bad also.
when i was with my ex he tried looking at half nude women in front of me while his friend was over. he never gave me any respect so i always felt disrespected.
it's a whole different ballgame with my new boyfriend. but if you don't feel comfortable, and you told him that. i don't want to tell you to resort to violence in hit him in front of everyone.
you cant allow him to disrespect you, because he will never stop.

ServiceU you hit the point. If he doesn't stop, I have no problem giving him a little taste of my Judo skills. haha. Thanks

lol
i dont know everyone's situation, but i tired hitting my ex, but he refused to give me respect no matter what.
his father was a womanizer, so the apple didnt fall far from the tree.

I say its normal at some level. but if it gets too much its wrong. but i had a friend who one time kept catching her husband checking out some girls so when a hot girl walked by she checked her out first and said something and the husband said hmm i didnt notice. maybe its just them though their like that lol. well good luck with you.

I guess its ok if he glances or commemts that a girl is pretty nothing wrong as long as he dont take it overboard and starts doing disrespectful things,he has to know what bothers you.

My husband watches boobs of other woman secretly at internet and when he's out with me. We had big fights and every time i cried and told him clearly it hurts me and makes me jealous and broke my trust, he cried and swear on me and our love that he wont ever do it again but did the same. We had biggest fight ever again and this time we had terms and conditions signed on paper. On admitting his doings he also told me he used to fantasize those bodies not woman and masturbates and even fantasize when have sex with me (importantly, we aren't having sex since 7 months since our daughter born and even not in pregnancy. but we were having oral sex often. Its been year and half since 'm married. It's a love marriage and i was and i'm still very beautiful to my husband as he says so. He likes big boobs and my cup size is B. I think i should also used birth control pills as i've heard they enlarge breasts. Anyway can anyone tell me why my husband watches boobs of other woman. Aint i attractive to him? Is our relationship weekend? What could be the reason?

I knid of have a similar issue. My husband seem sto have an issue controllin ghis urges to flirt with other girls. I saw on his myspace messages that he was talking to this one girl about sending xxx pictures back and forth. I caught him confronted him about it and he stopped that and deleted her. Then the other day he went to the grocery store and ran into a friend of his and she texted him later and said the girl she was with thought he was cute and wanted him ti text her and even after i said no and he told her he had a wife i later saw in his phone that he was textin her. He told her that she looked good and he was going to ask his friend about her. We had this huge discussion about it all and he said he is going to try and control it more but im worried he isn't going to be able to. I can't deal with that crap again I told him if I saw that crap again I was gone. i want to help him if it really is something thats uncontrolable but im not sure how.... HELP!!!!

Wow! It is amazing what some women put up with. What in the world would make you think it is okay for your husband to check out and/or lust after other women? Did he not have enough time to do that while he was single? When my husband and I got married we made a vow that we belonged to each other and that no one could or would ever break that bond. We both took it very seriously. So, the last thing he or I would do is ogle at the opposite sex and make comments at the expense of hurting one another's feelings.

I have never caught my husband checking out another woman in a lustful manner. He has too much respect for me for that.
I think most women who say they don't mind is because either they do it too or they have programmed themselves to believe that that is the way men are and don't believe they can find better. It's quite sad. I am obviously in the 1% who believes she deserves a man who will respect her and who gives the same respect to her husband as well. I have never caught my husband checking out another woman to simply "appreciate her beauty" either. Are you kidding me? That's the stuff I had to deal with in mediocre relationships where the guy didn't appreciate me; I have definitely moved on from that.

And to all these guys who say they can't help it or that it's natural; it's just an excuse. They just obviously have not found a woman that has captivated them enough to put those urges and desires to rest.

What if you were to do what he was doing? Would he just brush it off his shoulder? I doubt it. I think you should tell him how you feel. Your husband is supposed to make you feel like a queen and like you are the most important and beautiful person in the world. He definitely shouldn't be making you question your physical attractiveness.

It's times like these when I appreciate my husband the most and realize how lucky I am. There is someone out there who will only have eyes for you. You just have to dump this loser and find him.

You are not very bright to think your husband does not look! Having your photos and stuff is great and im sure he loves you very much...but if a sexy girl walked in front of him im sure he would notice..and if she is his type he would like it..dont be gallable!

You all were mighty pleased when your husbands were looking at you. If he wasn't visually responsive to women in his vicinity you wouldn't likely be with him. I'm not sure why you would think that he'd stop being a man when you married him. He shouldn't be disrespectful to you. If you're not interested in hearing about how hot other girls are you shouldn't be brought into the conversation. If you're not keen on looking at pornography he should have the decency to do it when you're not around. However, your man's attraction to women has nothing to do with you. He did it before you met him and he does it whether you're around or not. There's nothing disrespectful about a man being a man.

Well said! I will however let everyone know I am married and my man is very happy..he doesnt care what other woman look like ...I look at more woman than he does! Dont get me wrong..im sure he sees girls that are pretty and he notices..but then he walks on by and forgets them..that is how it should be! When you keep your man happy and he is in total love with you...nobody gets more than a glance...now if they are 'hunting' for a female that is different..no sexual thoughts should come up..if so then he should've stayed single so he could play the field...get what im saying? hopefully more woman come here and discuss/read.