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my boyfriend is secretly taking viagra and lying to me about it.

Ok, here we go... My bf and I have been together for about 11 months. When we first started dating he told me that after his divorce (2.5 years ago) he took cialis for ED because he was so nervous about being with another woman after 13 years of marriage. I get that and understood how that could happen - no issues. He also told me that he no longer needs it. Ok, no issue there either. Well, he is in his mid 40's and has the vigor of a 19 year old, which I thought "ok, great, but is this real or chemically induced" but never said anything. Just kept it to myself and wondered if maybe it was the newness of the relationship that had him so energized = )
Well, along the way there have been some signs that maybe my hunch was right: I have overheard conversations where he has said "i need to buy something from you - yea, the blue ones" - he is very secretive about his phone and computer and that concerns me, so I had the opportunity to snoop (I am not proud of this and feel horrible for having done it, but I needed to know) and I found text messages to a friend of his about an order they placed and I found an order confirmation on his computer email! So there it is - proof. So I asked him about it in a nice way - not insulting or accusatory. Just simply - "are you ordering viagra online?" his reply was "NO" and he got very angry. I explained to him that I wont be upset if he is, but I feel that this is definitely something he needs to share with me if he is - not just for trust issues, but health issues as well. He got angry and denied it all. I couldn't tell him how I knew or that I knew for sure, just that I had a hunch. He then checked his phone and computer and began texting his friend "the one he co-ordered with" like crazy. To me these are all signs of guilt. Last but not least, I found a pack of pills in his car console the other day (ok, I was pissed and looking for evidence). I know he is lying and am irate that he is being so devious about this and carrying the lie to the end. If he lies to me about something as stupid as this, how can I trust him on the larger issues?
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First Helper User Profile CarolineEF
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replied January 18th, 2011
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Hi: Your boyfriend is in his mid 40's...If he is taking Viagra secretly then he feels that he needs it...If you worry about trust and guilt then ask him...This is the only way that you will find out...Take care...

Caroline
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