I was in a 5 year relationship (married 2 years) where I was emotionally abused. After abuse he'd touch me and have sex with me though I wasn't willing...but I couldn't say no (and a few times he forcibly raped me as well). Eventually to cope I started enjoying sex with him physically (orgasming and everything) but not emotionally. We've been divorced 1 1/2 years and have PTSD (though much improved). I've been with two guys recently but no serious relationships. The problem is my body feels willing and enthusiastic even, but I still feel disconnected from what is going. It's almost like I'm watching someone else and not really feeling what my body is doing, or what he is doing to me. Is this just something that will improve with time or with a more serious and trusting relationship? or is there something else to do?
Welcome to the ehealthforum and I am really glad to help you out. I can understand your concern for the abusive relationship. From the symptoms it looks like that you are having post traumatic stress disorder. Symptoms of PTSD include irritability, violent outbursts, trouble working or socializing flashbacks or intrusive images and losing touch with reality. The symptoms of PTSD may resemble other psychiatric conditions. So please consult a psychiatrist to rule out other possibilities.
Treatment involves beta adrenergic blockers such as propranolol (Inderal), alpha2-adrenergic agonists such as clonidine, antidepressants, valproic acid (an anticonvulsant and mood stabilizer), and benzodiazepines (sedatives and anti-anxiety drugs) and these should be taken against a prescription.
It is very difficult to precisely confirm a diagnosis without examination and investigations and the answer is based on the medical information provided. For exact diagnosis, you are requested to consult your doctor. I sincerely hope that helps. Take care.
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