Medical Abortion Forum - Must you have someone with you for a surgical abortion ????

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Q: Must you have someone with you for a surgical abortion ????

asked by: poohlady on March 9th, 2008

New User

Hello to all,

I am 11 weeks pregnant and I am devastated!! I found out a few weeks ago, and I have been so torn about this. I am a bar tender who drinks HEAVILY as it is "encouraged" by the owner to increase sales. After I found out I was preg. I had started cramping and bleeding. I welcomed the miscarriage if that was indeed happening. Well, it was not so.. I have explored the internet to encourage or induce a miscarriage but to my dismay, I am too far along. I feel and believe with all of my heart this baby will not be healthy due to the amount of alcohol I have drank and I do not feel it is right to bring an unwanted child who will be medically challenged due to my consumption.

I have a clinic about 2 hours from where I live, but it says I MUST have someone there with me?!?!?!?!? Is this normal as I would rather not tell anyone that I am having an abortion. Several people know, including the father, who does not support abortion, but does not support this child. Who knows what would happen or say or anything if he found out?

I have also seen an OB, and I do not feel comfortable telling him that I have had an abortion if I can go thru with it. How can I hide such a thing?

I wanted to keep this private, as I live in a small town and everyone knows everything about everyone else. This is why I was considering a medical abortion instead of a surgical one, but now everyone and everything is saying I am too far along.

PLZ!! I need some help and advice... How can I fake a miscarriage if I get a surgical abortion?? Can that even be possible???

Sorry as I know there are many questions inside this topic... but any and all advise is much needed and I thank you all!!

Replies(12)

amino65

replied on March 9th, 2008

Experienced User

Hello,

I am very sorry that you find yourself in this predicament. And you do not have to justify yourself; it is your choice and you know what is best for you!

Yes you are correct, you are too far gone for a medical abortion and to attempt one now could be dangerous for your health.

It is also true that you have to have someone with you when you have a surgical abortion, because you will be given some kind of anesthetic/sedative to lessen the pain of the procedure. They cannot legally let you drive after you have been put under sedation.

Do you perhaps have a friend who can take you? The procedure is not long at all, about 5-10 minutes, perhaps you can find someone willing to help you that you can trust to be discreet?

I'm sorry the father is not being more supportive in your choice, but only you know what is right for you, don't let anyone pressure you otherwise.

Carifairy is extremely knowledgeable in this arena, hopefully she answers this quickly.

Good luck to you!
-Amino65

sunbrown

replied on March 10th, 2008

New User

I had a surgical after a medical failed and the clinic I go to does not require a driver unless IV sedation is used. I drove myself home which was 1.5 hours away with no problems.

I did get anesthesia and something to help me relax, but other than that I was awake and it hurt but was over quite quickly. The doctor was so nice and talked to me so supportively through the process.

Carifairy

replied on March 10th, 2008

Extremely eHealthy

The procedure is VERY painful if you go alone and cannot be put to sleep or sedated, so if you prefer pain free, go with IV sedation.

NO ONE will know that you had an abortion if you tell them it was a miscarriage, abortion does not cause any 'markers' where anyone could know.

MaineGirl76

replied on March 10th, 2008

New User

I had a surgical abortion last May. I drove myself there and back. The Planned Parenthood here does not offer IV sedation of any kind. The only thing they offered me was a Lorazapam(sp). They said that I would have to stay for another 2 hours after the procedure to ensure I was able to drive home safely. I was fine, the Lorazapam did nothing for me at all.

Take Care.

lele25

replied on March 10th, 2008

Active User, very eHealthy

You can have the procedure done with out sedation, although I have heard that its not very comfortable, however then you would be able to drive your self. Also, and I realize this may be very pricey, you could get a taxi service to take to and from the facility.

poohlady

replied on March 10th, 2008

New User

Well, I did it... I have talked to a friend who is understanding.... I am going to call the clinic tomorrow and hopefully get things set up...

I am scared, scared of my choice, what I am about to do, ect ect ect.

Like I said before, I live in a small town and everyone knows about everything about everyone.... but I am now at the point, that if he finds out, I will have to take the outcome. I cannot continue this..

Thank you everyone for your post and welcoming words of guidance..

I am pleased I found this website and empowered by the postings not onlyy to me but to others who are scared, in need, ect ect ect...

Again, I am calling the clinic tomorrow, and I broke the "barrier of silence" and I have someone who will go with me.....

I may write again before I go, but I may just sit back and read some of the wonderful support everyone gives out....

Thank you again!!

Carifairy

replied on March 10th, 2008

Extremely eHealthy

MAINE GIRL-

Planned Parenthood is well known, but I usually tell women to choose clinics OTHER than PP for abortion.

PP is more herdy than other clinics, and does not offer the same painless abortion services as other places do.

MaineGirl76

replied on March 11th, 2008

New User

Carifairy
I agree with you on that. I just wanted to get it done and over with. It was quite painful, although, only for a few minutes but if I am ever in that situation again I will definately look into another facility.

And yes it did seem very herdy, the morning I went in, the waiting room was filled with so many women that were there for an abortion, I felt like we were cattle and not women.

MaineGirl76

replied on March 11th, 2008

New User

poohlady wrote:

You are very welcome. It's ok to be scared, its natural. But you will be ok. Everything will work itself out just fine.

This site is wonderful. I found so much support here. There are alot of great women on here, and they all genuinely care. PM me anytime you feel like talking.

And to Carifairy,
I just wanted to say they I think what you do is wonderful. I have been lurking around for awhile and you have always been very helpful, comforting, and caring to everyone. You certainly are an asset to this forum as well as the clinic you work for.

Take Care.

lucy315

replied on March 11th, 2008

Experienced User

MaineGirl76 wrote:

I completely agree with you. I did not go to PP, but I did feel like I was being herded like cattle! Of course it was a Saturday, so it was quite crowded. I chose not to be sedated, and it was painful, but very quick. I drove myself there and back. The only reason I chose that clinic, was because there was no counseling available. I knew I wanted the abortion, and just wanted to be in and out.

poohlady - Good luck with everything. I'm glad you found someone you can trust and who is understanding. Everything will be fine.

MarieCurie

replied on September 6th, 2008

New User

I went to PP, yes it was crawded and I had to wait like 6-7 hours but they treated us so good and they were all very sweet and helpful

fadedddddx

replied on March 12th, 2009

New User

see where i am from, pp doesn't offer surgical i have to go to some certain hospital

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