Schizophrenia Forum - Mom is schitzophrenic

I wrote this detailed story about my mom in hopes of finding other survivors in this type of situation. I would also like to know if this is normal.

My mom has been schitzophrenic since I was 3 so for the last 17 years. I think her case is the mild chronic type because we cannot convince her that she is ill & she never had any treatment or took any medication. About 10 years ago when my dad was somehow putting up with her for our sake, he had her taken away & evaluated & she was smart & conniving enough to fool the tests.

When I was 3 it started by food tasting funny, she made my dad go out of the way to a different grocery store & said to get the 3rd bag of milk from the second shelf & a bunch of other instructions. So my dad listens & does it then when she tasted the milk, she dumped it all down the sink then started critisizing my dad saying that hes too stupid to follow instructions. My dads not the best parent either, hes pretty neglectfull, but I'd take a neglectfull foster parent over my mom anyday if I was a kid.

She would always talk to me since I was 3 blaming all her problems on me saying that I'm wrecking the family. Everytime she made a mistake she would blame it on me for stressing her out. We had to move 3 times because she just couldnt get along with the neighbors, she didnt like the way they walked & talked so she picked fights & nailed them for whatever she can. Each time me & my bro suffered because we couldnt associate with the neighbors because of her.

I take after her so she knows my difficulties, like when I was young I used to have a hard time socializing so she mocked me. She knew how to make me feel like everything I do is pathetic & predictable. I then made a lot of other mistakes then she had more reasonable grounds to critisize me. In the end I felt pathetic & became so insecure, unconfident & pretty suicidal because I had no one else but her. It came to the point where it was "be my little puppet on my finger or I'll critisize you, you pathetic little animal" For the longest time I thought this was right, that I was predictable & pathetic. She pounded her perception of reality in my head & I beleived it. I think at this point my dad should have stepped in & set my head straight but he didnt realise.

You can just imagine me dealing with high school bullies, they would eat me alive, I was the source of everyones laughter. That gave my mom more reasons to critisize me, saying that it was my fault. I never had a girlfriend throughout high school or gradeschool because I was right messed up & my mom critisized my character for that. Its like, go back under the rock you came from son.

I finally set myself straight when I moved in with my dad a few years ago. I had to, it was at the point where she would blame me for hiding her stuff whenever she couldnt find something, mock me everytime I made a mistake in her eyes & remind me how much of a messes up I am. She was hammering this into in my head several times a day. I left with my dad when my mom hid my anxiety medication when she though I forgot my sunglasses somewhere on purpose to aggrevate her. She also drove like a maniac with my computer in the car hoping to brake it because she knew it was my pride & joy. She also cancelled the internet for vengeance purposes.

She feeds off getting so called vengeance on me, she knows what to say to make me scream inside with a crooked look of power on her face.

I move in with my dad, I hear about twice as many stories about her from him. She kicked him out of his house & went straight for his Remote Control cars that he's been desinging & building since he was young, they were his pride & joy. She sold whatever she can for peanuts & snipped the wires on everything else, I seen his face when he walked into his workshop, he was screaming with anger as she stared him down with a evil smile of vengeance.

She took him to the cleaners & got a bunch of money when they broke up then did it again when she kicked me out. My dad was trying to help me go through college, raise my younger bro, pay spousal support & he was paying lawyer fees up the azz after they've been broken up for 8 years.

My dad had a lot on his plate at that time but he was still managing untill my mom goes behind the lawyers back, calls the family responsibility system & somehow legally garnish half his wages & another $1200 a month when he had both kids dreaming to put them through school. This is where my dad screwed up, I think you can guess what he started getting into, he would spend about $200 a week on beer.

My dads is an azz hole when hes drunk, he started taking everything out on me & I was damaged enough as it was so I took it & let it get to me. By this point I thought I was hopeless & tried hanging myself 3 times but backed out & saved myself each time, the last time I didnt think I was gonna get out, I think God helped me that time. I made a lot of stupid choices last summer & ended up getting kicked out of my dads house & loosing my colledge dream.

I'm back with my mom now, its still the same, shes fighting with the neighbors, I was associated with them for 6 years & can't talk to them anymore because my mom dosent like the way they walk & talk & just can't get along with them. If she catches me talking to them, she kicks me out or cancels my internet.

If I were to associate with any female, my mom would always have that evil eye on her. The next day my mom would threaten to cancel the internet or kick me out if I were to ever talk to that girl again. My mom would also critisize me & laugh at me for weeks on end for wanting to associate with her. She hassles me everytime I want a ride somewhere thinking its to visit my friend.

This is all I can think of now, but it dosent stop here, this is only a small part of her complicated evil personality. This is only words

But now, I'm armed with 2 tools that help me cope with her, Alcohol & Knowledge. I let my neighbors know what my moms like & gave them a heads up letting them know that their one of her targets. I'm a lot smarter, secure & confident & know how to fight my battles & lately I've been beating her at her own game. Its only a matter of time before she screwes up in front of people & Ms Hide's evil eye & crooked face finally get noticed.

I am permanently damaged, my one mission before I move out is for everyone to realise what really happened & why I made my choices.