I don't know where to start really, my mood first of all are ever changing, i'll just feel uncontrolably sad for no reason one minute i'll just cry and be inconsolable but i don't know why. The next minute i'll be happy, then angry and i just don't understand why. I have a constant monologue going on in my head, constantly talking to myself in my head, i can't make decisions, i just can't even something like what i'm going to eat. I analyis everthing far too much. I will just sit and think about something so much especially when trying to make a decision, and i never find the answer because i analyis it to a point where nothing seems right.

I do strange things that i'm sure people don't do, like count lamposts and not be able to stop until i just grab hold of myself and tell myself repeatedly to stop i will eventually stop but not for a while. Or turn the light switch on and off, why do i do that? i know its off but i'll continue to switch it back on. Someone once told me about Obsessive compulsive disorder but i dont think its that because 'm not bothered about cleanliness or anything and i dont do these things all of the time.

Its like i have 2 people fighting for there right to speak in my head, but they are always trting to convince me that the other is lying and there right but i never know who to believe.

I go to work, i work in a normal job, i have relationships and friends. I have major trusts issues, always not quite sure, the other day i thlught my boyfriend who i know and love and have been with for 2 years was plotting to kill me, i shook the idea off and ignored it but should it of been there in the first place. I don't know what to do.