Hello,

I am very intrigued by a post I had seen on here, dated 2007 - slightly similar to the case I am about to describe, and hope that someone can be of assistance with it. It is a long post, but hopefully detailed enough to gain a picture from. I am quite doubtful that many people have ever suffered this feeling, but I'll try and explain..

I always have strange symptoms from consuming alcohol, and naturally because of this, and other fitness reasons, I would usually only ever drink say every 6-8 months anyway - with no set time for doing so. I am a competitive runner and have never really been that interested in drinking or chosen to get involved with it in any way regardless. When out socially, I usually drink soft drinks, but on rare occasions, have drank alcohol when a change of mood comes over me to do so - usually influenced by others or the situation. However, as stated, to actually do that is very rare, and in the last 3 years or so I have probably only been drunk on around 10 occasions at the most.

Now to explain things in some more detail... the feelings that I get from drinking, whether it be any amount small or large, is usually the same. While drinking, I am fine, and react the same I would imagine as anyone else - tolerating alcohol fine, getting drunk the same - it is the effects in the morning which get to me the most - and PLEASE do not chalk this up as a hangover - I am aware of how one should feel, and certainly how long it should last. This is completely different.

The feelings are of a constant lightheadedness, not feeling myself, my speech being somewhat affected in everyday talking (i.e. struggling sometimes to form together complex thoughts into speech), being irritated, somewhat depressed with the feeling on a daily basis, and just generally feeling 'different' in my head - mentally. I am more 'down', and more detached from people, and my self-motivation, and mood just takes a hit. Time seems to pass in the day, and recalling earlier events seem to feel like they have taken place over a much longer time frame (if this makes sense), and I am somewhat more aware of the thoughts in my head, and irritated by them. I am simply always are of this odd feeling just not 'being there' or 'with it'. Physically, I can feel worse when I run, and more unfit than I know I am. Try likening it to the strange head rush you get from standing up quickly, and that is somewhere towards it - but it is much more than just a dizzy feeling - there is a different state of mind that I just 'feel'. This doesn't however lead me onto any other 'dodgy' thinking about things or whatever - I simply just always deal with it.

The strangest thing of all of those symptoms is the time in which they last - at least 2-3 months, and sometimes up to 6 months, as strange as it sounds - hence why I simply don't take the chance drinking anymore - as it has happened a number of times now for me to always know it will occur and last a long time. This effectively makes it quite a chore to put up with in every day life. It will gradually disappear after this time frame, when my thoughts about the feeling gradually ease - i.e., when I am not constantly waking up hoping it will be gone, and simply just getting on with life.

It would however be good to drink like other people - and I have no gripes with actually tolerating alcohol, it is simply the after effects, *EVERY* time I drink anything - it is almost like I know it is coming, and so cannot help but convince myself it will happen. It always does. I have considered it to be a mental condition that maybe my own thoughts have influenced, or something else entirely - such as an allergic reaction - but I am surprised that such a reaction is not physical. To give any background as to why this may be happening could be related to my first proper drinking experience at 16 - even then I felt a kind of guilt for doing it, and from that night, had the feelings I describe now - the morning after - lasting a few months. Since then, it has always been the case. Is a longstanding guilt my problem? I'm not religious or come from any background which has negative views on drinking, but I think as I have always been a sensible person, and keen on fitness, to drink seemed to be betraying myself...in a way?

In every other area of my life, I would class myself as normal in my habits, social circles, way of living etc - this is the only thing which concerns me, and leaves me simply confused when it happens. I have never taken drugs, do not (or have never) smoke(d), do not have any disorders or take any medication (now or previous).

If anyone has any input on this, it would be appreciated. Unfortunately the safest bet for myself has always been to steer clear of alcohol, though it would be good to enjoy some, sensibly and socially with friends without the feeling occurring the next day for the time stated. To clarify, regardless of what is causing the feeling - I can honestly say that it *IS* happening, and not some OCD- like thought. Though I'm not ruling out anything on something I can't fully comprehend yet!

Additionally, the reasons for my strict avoidance of alcohol in general these days has been hard to explain to family and friends.

Thanks.