Hi All,
New to chatting about this,
ok well i had a lovely time up until my school stopped us playing in the sand pit and painting everthing that moved , & started teaching us stuff, It because obvious to everyone ,but me that there was something wrong!!
and my life turned on its head in ,months, turned out i needed special english and maths lessons, i couldn't read nearly any four letter words , and,was made 2 read out loud as was all the other kids but i always got the slipper, because i made no progress.
anyway the stress i found myself under was unbearable , I gained about 4 stone in weight in max 1 year , and i was still only about 9 years old
my school life was hell , and when i got home it was my dads turn to tell me , he was embarrassed by me because i was english and couldnt read or wright it, also my weight was spiraling i had a 38in waist at 10 years old !!!! I had a family doctor , who never said anything about my massive weight gain in so short a time !!!!
my dad said well have to tie you down , your gonna float away if you dont stop eating
& that sort of 5 year out of control wieght gain cycle has happened again in my teens and twenties , and thirties, my putting on weight as i type this
i weight 24 stone now
so anyway ,i moved a few times saw a few doctors for silly things , but wanted to say "hey i really want you to notice that i need anti depressents , but i cant ask you for them, so i went no without sometimes great things would happen in life but always so short lived , at least by me, in 2006 my father died of cancer , I could feel myself move up a gear, & i thought i need to go doctors this time its gonna be more than be4 , i will end up 30 stone
i was put on amitryptyline in england
I moved to spain 5 months ago to help my mum settle in , as she bought a small place here , everyone said the sun would do me the world of good ,i get tryptizol from the farmacia here
i take 25mg at about 11am,everyday, they helps me,but sometimes im in floods of tears, and i couldnt stop them even if my life depended on it

I have many good friends but noone in my life, and that gets real boring

is there a better medicine for my kind of constant negativaty

Many thx for Any one that takes the time to read this , & double Thx for anyone that can point me in a better direction