I have schizophrenia. I have recently become very close to a girl. I do not know how it happened. As my name states, I am a misnathrope. I do not have any friends, exept people I can use for something. All I usualy think about is how to hurt other people, but she is diffrent. All I want to do is protect her.
She knows about my illness and is trying her best to help me. I care very deeply for her, but how does my illness affect this?
I have permanent auditory illusions. The voice is extreemly violent and constantly orders me to kill people. It has recently become worse. I have had two murder attemts.
One night the voice totally took over. It said very hurtful things to her. She said that she forgave me, but it bothers me. What if it happens again?
She has alot op problems of her own. The last thing I want to do is hurt her.
Would it be better if I stop talking to her, to protect her from me?
Please help.