Love-Hate towards eating...

I'll start off by saying that I'm overweight. I'm around 210 pounds. Lately I've noticed that I have a really weird relationship with eating. For all my life I've never been careful with my nutrition, hence my bad weight. After a change of heart I decided to start eating healthy. This meaning that for a week I used to eat just fruit and veggies. But after the first week I snapped. It was like I didn't have any strength in me. The strange thing is that I don't actually eating any more. I feel disgusting when eating. But... whenever I feel hungry it's like my mind is obscured and I eat junk food!And then 5 minutes later I feel so much guilt and mostly I cry...I came down to the conclusion that It's like a sickness... I think I'm sick some sorts... I should also add that when this happens afterwards subconsciously try to starve myself, by not eating the whole rest of the day. I know it sounds kinda funny but I cannot control myself anymore!