Hi,

I've recently experienced a really painful breakup. My boyfriend of 8 months simply told me that he no longer loved me. After much begging and sobbing I hung up the phone and broke into hysterics. I had to do a double shift at work, and the moment I could get away from customers i started to cry again. My night shift was no better. The next night I had to work again and all that changed was that I got better at pretending even though a customer caught me sobbing out the back.

I was really in love with him. He was my first love and even my first time. and now i don't know what to do. for the first two days of the breakup i did nothing but cry and mope around lifelessly. it is now 4 days later and i'm worried. I'm making myself really sick. and now my mind has blocked it out in what i assume was self preservation.

I am currently suffering the following symptoms:
-restless sleep
-no appetite
-acid stomach
-hot flushes
-head aches
-extreme moodswings and depression
-chest pains
-palpataions
-nausea
-detachment from reality
-numbness (emotionally)
-pins and needles
and i've lost well over a kilo in under 3 days.

i don't know what to do, i'm trying to force things upon myself so i can deal with it and move on but with the newest development in my syptoms i can't even do that (the mental blocking). i've been trying to find a reason for him falling out of love with me when i so obviously still love him. apparently that had been going on for over a month. yet he still went through most of the actions of a loving partner. the most annoying thing is that a part of me realised this but i was so deep in denial that i just hoped he'd snap out of it. i feel so stupid and i feel cheap and dirty.

i think i'm going to make myself really sick. i can barely bring myself to eat and when i do my entire days worth of 'meals' winds up being less than an average meal. what can i do? i'm really scared that these aren't going to go away. i'm already underweight so the weightloss terrifies me. please help.