she needs professional help. i have bipolar 1 and i'm finally properly medicated after over a decade of pure hell. but, i have mostly depressed bp. you can't do it for her. does she know she has a problem? does it bother her? i put up a facade for so long then i eventually snapped... and i couldn't fake it. it's a heartbreaking illness. puzzld

That was meant to lighten the mood Your wife must have the exact same version of bipolar as mine. She could be her twin by the sounds of it. If youre at the beginning of the med process or she has not yet determined she needs meds,I feel for you either way. My wife took meds for the last year and a half and turned into a Zombie. The attention,affection youre looking for,basically goes away. If its low now,the meds will destroy it. Ive been complaining about affection in vain for years. It is something you might as well get used too.You dont have to like it. Its reality. And the sooner you accept it and start worrying about yourself,the better. I love my wife very much. But there are times she seems so distant.I dont understand bipolar but one thing I do know is that there brain goes places that ours dont. You know what else? Its not her fault. I dont mean to be cold. i really am trying to help. The thing that Ive found helps best is this. Use this opportunity to make yourself a better person. A stronger person. Youll become stronger regardless. But this experience can help you as much as it hurts. Ill tell you this, my skin is thicker than ever. I dont get depressed anymore. I put things in perspective. I make better decisions. What doesnt kill you makes you stronger. Even when its emotional. Make yourself a better stronger person. It will help you and your wife. SO much more than you know.

I agress with Barto about the emotions being dampened by the medication. I feel like a zombie and can take it or leave it attitude.

I do things for my husband because I want to make him happy, not because it makes me happy. I initiate sex and will hold his hand when we are walking. But me, I just don't feel romantic any more. I just do it so my husband does not notice or suffer from my lack of feelings.

I am not saying that I hate it, cause I do like it, just I am not capable of enjoying it like I use to before I started the medication.

All I can say is to keep trying, she does love you and needs some encouragement to keep engaged with you.

My wife woke up a couple months ago without any feeling for me, her husband of 10 yrs and 3 kids. She is BP and going manic, I believe. Never felt her so cold before. Any meds worth trying to bring the feelings back? I don't want to loose the marriage, and I agree my efforts are making me a stronger person. But no feelings, no sex, just cold stone. I love and desire her but cannot have her right now.

Put her on omega 3 fish oil capsules for some months. This will improve mood management.

Ask for her to be prescribed clozapine if possible. This will improve thought management.

With omega 3 and the right dose of clozapine, she will be back to her former self - within 6 months or 1 year.

I have been married for 15yrs to my hubby & also suffer from Bi Polar disorder (my Dad has it too). I have yrs where I have no feelings..I truly love my hubby more than anything..I've known him longer than anyone but I go deep within myself, like I can't find myself & I'm just a body going through the motions..I have taken pills for depression off & on all my life..What I can tell you that worked for me, time & patience from my husband. He let's me come to him now for affection instead of chasing me down. BUT he does reach out to me & shows me in small ways that he wants affection w/o pawing me. I feel I have truly deeply fallen in love w my husband..even the sick/depressed me has. I think that's the key is to get the sick part of your soul to also feel enough to love your partner to bring you out of your funk. It's hard on your companion & I want to tell you we understand your pain & can know you feel pain..BUT our pain makes us so numb it's hard to do anything (even bathing can take alot)..Then when they think they caused it..It tends to stress you out more & make you pull away more. Patience is the key & IT DOES GET BETTER! =D