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Q: Judging his intentions
asked by: TheEndisNear on September 17th, 2009
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I'm a 19-year-old college sophomore, but I'm a lot less socially experienced than most people my age. Since the new semester started I've met a LOT of new people. I'm finding it kind of overwhelming. Unfortunately, my lack of social experience also makes it really difficult for me to judge someone's intentions in interacting with me. (Yes, this is one of those stupid "does he like me?" topics. Sort of. It's more a "what does this mean?" topic.)

In particular, I'm having trouble with one guy. We met right before the semester started via a mutual friend, and wound up IMing each other every other day or so. Outside of when we met, we didn't actually interact in-person... but we got along very well online. We hung out for the second time in-person at the end of the first week of the semester, we met up at school and he introduced me to a friend of his. Since then, we have met up with each other almost every day at school. We grab lunch together and generally spend at least an hour and a half talking, in addition to the IMing we've done.

After the second week of the semester I wound up attending a convention with him, our mutual friend, and the friend he had introduced me to... it was there that I began to notice that I was attracted to him. As I said, I'm very socially inexperienced, so I spent the next two weeks steadfastly attempting to convince myself otherwise... last week, I finally had to give up and admit to myself that I was interested.

I've been attempting to study body language, but I can't tell the difference between good-friends interactions and romantic-interest interactions. These are the things I've taken note of in our interactions... your feedback on if any of these have any meaning would be appreciated.

-He doesn't smile often, but he tends to smile slightly when we meet up and he grins at my jokes.
-On one of the few days we didn't wind up hanging out, he IMed me commenting that I wasn't in my "usual place". (The place we had been running into each other up until that point.)
-When we're in a group, he tends to sit looking directly ahead with his arms crossed. But when it's one on one, he faces towards me and uses a lot more gestures.
-He met a few other people around the same time that he met me. He's bad with names, so he gave them all nicknames (to the effect of. "Girl who uses a red sketchbook") instead and calls them by that. He both remembered and uses my name.
-As I mentioned before there's a certain place on campus we usually meet up, which he refers to as my "usual spot". He's usually there on one of the computers. I've found out from his friend that he did not start spending time in that location until we started hanging out. Now he's there all of the time.

Sometimes he will glance at me for a few seconds, and look away if we make eye contact, but I don't think it happens often enough to have any significance.

So... er... any feedback? I'll answer any questions to the best of my ability.
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W0LF
replied on September 20th, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
Any college student who spends an hour and a half a day just talking with you is interested in you. There are just too many distractions and obligations in college for someone who's casual about you to devote that kind of time.

Don't judge people's intentions or body language. You're not psychic or a military trained interrogator and you really can't afford to guess wrong when it comes to people. If you want to know what this guy is about ask him.
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LLindy87
replied on October 1st, 2009
New User
It sounds like he likes you or at least is interested in getting to know you better. Hang in there Smile
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jma
replied on October 5th, 2009
New User
most guys dont ever spend alot of time with a girl unless they are attracted to the girl
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