I have been seeing a guy "Bob" on and off for 2.5 yrs.Prior to me he was in a 5yr relationship. The girl he dated was a money hungry psycho.She went as afr as cutting up clothes,burning bed, slashing tires etc.All her life she was in and out of psychologists.She was okay 1 sec then would fight who ever was in front of her at that time.When him and I started they had been broken up for a year.Things were good at first...their relationship was based on trips and money. Mine and his was different as due to teh economy his finances were reduced drastically. I never cared as I cared about him. Things were ok at first and things seemed normal. Then I started to notice that he was ok and then that he would be in a bad mood when i asked him why he said that he didn't want to talk...this was like 9 months into the relationship. He said he is that kind of person and that he doesn't give explanations to anyone. If we got into an argument then he wouldn't talk to me for days. I would ask him and he is like I am a cold person...but then he would be okay again. Back in May of 2007 him and I broke up..I found out that he went on a trip with is ex. When he got back he looked for me right away. He was completely new again liek the person I knewand he remained that way over the next year. Then in April of 2008 when the economy got bad the mood swings started again and really bad this time. I would ask but he would tell me he had a lot on his plate and that eh would stressed out. I decided that it was time for me to walk away it just became too much for me. One day fine on day bad....We still remained friends w/benefits. Then in June the ex reappeared calling him on Father's day returning soem stuff that he had left at her house. He said that he was ok with that since he wasn't looking for arelationship and that he didn't want to commit to anyone. Then the situation got really bad. It even got violent. He was basically seeing her and I "dating".Things got really bad w/everyone at that point he said that he was confused and that I was the better woman but that he just did not want a relationship. I let the situation go on and on up until now. The past 4 months he has only seen her once but they do speak occasionally. She normally calls to say that he is a jerk that she wasted the best yrs of her life that she is going to kill herself...or she will call really nice to ask for help on things. For the past 2 months he has gotten violent more than once...it seems liek he just snaps if you say something he doesn't like...he gets loud starts using bad words and starts putting me down. I do not know why I do not insult him or disrespect him. Sometimes I am jealous of her cause I do not knwo what he feels for me. One day he ignores me the next day he is loving...If I start to move on then he gets angry and jealous. The first time he got violent it was because of jealousy almost paranoid. I have never gone out with another man since I started with im...yet she has..and nothing gets said to her. Now if I go out with my friends then he thinks that I am staying out late to drive by to see where he is at. I told him that he is paranoid and he said he knows me. Evrytime we go to do something it is his way or no way. All his ideas are the best and all his conversations are the best. He can tell you about his bad day but doesn't want to hear about yours. Now when we go out with people he is okay then he isolates himself and then he is ok again. Sometimes I feel like he doesn't acre but then you ask and he says yes I care I am just like this and that he doesn't want a relationship that he does whatever he wants. I just can't believe someone would have such mood changes from one moment to the next. He is 40 yrs old I am 29 yrs old. PLease Help.