Is this aniexty or a form or depression?

I'm new hear and not sure if this is why I'm suppose to be posting. I would just like some feedback on whT you think is wrong and how I should handle my situation----but i think i might have some sort of anxiety or depression. I went to the doctor but when i got in i just said something else lol. im embarrassed to even be writing this. soooo heres whats going on

Always tired have to drag myself out of bed. i have no engery to do anything...take my daughter to the park, school, clean, laundry anthing i feel soo drained Hard to fall asleep at night. (I think people are robbing me or in my house to kill me. Even if my boyfriend checked the whole house I think what if they were already in before and kept moving around) Feel like everything is about to end I catch myself yelling at myself in my thoughts, or arguing what? Low self esteem constantly putting myself down. I try to ingnore it because I want to be happy and love myself but I can't. I feel like I am losing my mind, that I'm not in control of my mind. heres something weird...I take the bus everyday and I can't have people sit behind me I'm scared they might try to strangle me or put a needle in me trying to be discrete to kill me... and I always plan my escape route if something were to happened. Ex people came with weapons. Sounds crazy. Public places like a mall are ok but I still always have a plan for if something would happen what I woud do and where I'd go to. I hate taking the train because I'm locked in until the next stop. If i suspect someone who "has it out for me" i will get off as soon as i can and wait fir the next bus\train. If something were to happen I couldn't get out. I'm always worrying what others think of me, even strangers. " oh look at that girls she's overweight blah blah she probably eats everything" or awe I feel bad for her she must have an over eating disorder. Her hair looks gross and dry. Her cloths arnt good enough. She bites her nails look how ugly her hands look. Shoes are dirty. anything I feel like people are judging me Nd I get paranoid and feeling like crap, it's hard to eat lately because I feel like my tougne doesn't work and I can't swallow, I don't wanna choke. I always think of people making fun of me. Sometimes i think of my death (or my daughter) in my mind and it's a whole story line imaging of what would happen and how useless i would be to help them-myself. It makes me very scared and I get panicky and shaky and my hand sweat and I feel like a lump in my throat. And again I can't swallow and my chest and throat feels like ad it's hard to breath heart racing, I don't kno what to do. My boyfriend says it's all in my head and just laughs it off. It terrifys me thinking about the past like how fast time flies. Or thinking about the future. Like I'm scared and hate feeling like this. sometimes I get images or tunes replaying in my head when I close my eyes. And I feel like I'm not here it's weird hard to explain. Then other times apart from being nervous and panicky, my mood complely changes and i go from that to just mean and angry, freakout and everyone has to suffer becasue i am. I pick fights with my boyfriend for something so small hat could of been preventedf with a talk. I turn into a raging rude, mean BEEP!. NO IDEA. I feel embarassed ( i sat here for ten mins before i could post this) and dont want to mention it to anyone anymore becasue i dont want to get laughed at, rejected, or have them say * its all in your head*
---There's lots more but this is just an idea for you guys. Any thoughts about this?