Is my husband brain washed??

Im married to a mama's boy! i hate it so much. When i met Doug, things were bad in regards to her steppin in our business, always expecting to have her say. We've been married for 13 yrs, and most of our problems were because of her. the past five yrs has been hell. I never seen him for the entire time! she was diagnosed with cancer. I have no problems with him helping her, but he thought it would be ok to leave me to tend to her for a month! Our marriage is at a stand still right now. After a week of arguing he agreed to stay, like i should have to bargain time with my husband. How generous of him hugh! She makes doctor appointments in the eve so when he gets home its time for bed. She knows it makes me mad, i changed that as well. What would possess a mother to do this to her son and wife. It's insane that i even had to deal with it in the first place. I'm winning the battle.