I am a 25-year old woman without any intercourse experience but a high sexual drive, who have been experiencing an in ability to control my sexual eye-signals. I involuntarily send people I am talking to signals that I am sexually interested in them. Most people (acquaintances, close friends and family members) react to the signals I am sending, and I thus start behaving (non-verbally) less than naturally because I feel uncomfortable. I have been experiencing this with females and males and I do not consider myself bisexual or homosexual. It thus seems that I send these signals to anyone whom I feel emotionally attracted to without having any inner desire to have sex or any kind of physical contact! When I have sent these signals to a person I am unable to stop my less than normal non-verbal behaviour no matter how hard I try distract or change my thoughts and thus behaviour! These signals can occur at any situation, and very suddenly! My problem is that I find it so uncomfortable that I tend to avoid seeing the people to whom I have sent these signals, as I am afraid I will send these less than appropriate signals again (which I often do, as I know that they know what I must have been thinking when I sent the sexual eye-contact-signal in the first place)!! I would really like it to get it under control, so that I do not need to deal with the consequences of it anymore!!
In addition, I have never had intercourse, and only had very few intimate sexual experiences (thus intimate relationships), as I find it hard to find someone whom I feel emotionally comfortable with and sexually attracted to. And with out this combination, I donât feel that I can give myself fully to someone else.
The funning thing about subconscious activity is that it is not controlled. It expresses your feelings without the censorship of your mind. If you are certain that you don't hold a sexual attraction to the people you are "Sending signals to" then it is possible they're misinterpreting your visual cues.
What is telling you that you're sending messages with your eyes or posture or hands that you don't mean to?
My view is that people might be misinterpreting and you might be assuming you are at fault. I'll give you an example. When I was at University there was this fantastic guy who was so friendly, so helpful, so good looking, but he never meant it in a sexual way. He was as nice to me, (I was married, husband with me) as he was to unmarried females.
One female took his niceness for sexual interest, and passed remarks which got back to him.
After that, he locked out all females, save those who were married and with their husbands, to avoid this belief that a chap who sees that you don't have a pen and loans you his is making sexual advances.
I know I send signals and so often say; "I adore your ideas," or "I am in love with that concept", which immediately clues the listener into where my passion is.
My opinion on this subject is that you are a naturally sensuous woman who happens to be very attractive or "sexy". If you were considered unattractive you would see that no one would want to "misinterpret" your signals. They would not be interested so you would have nothing to worry about. However you are probably very sexual or sensuous looking and most people would like your attentions on them! It is not your fault that your eye contact is intense or sensual. Just be yourself. Many woman in the media who are considered sex symbols have this problem. Use it to your advantage. Sexy women often get "told they are leading others on". Some are called "sluts or teases" its always because the person saying it desires them and wishes they did not. Well look at the beautiful woman in music or videos or actresses. Its their natural looks or expressions that get attention for being sexual. Really it is all genetic. Nothing they did would get the same attention if they didn't look that way. So....be yourself and don't worry what anyone says. Just say you like them....and when you show interest it is because you like who they are or are fascinated by what they have to say. Don't feel like you owe them an explanation! You do not! And don't feel like you have to do something sexual. Its not your fault they are desiring or wanting your attention to become more....