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im wondering whats wrong with my mom

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i know a little bit of her background. she was from an alcoholic dad who could be mean. she has always been nice to me sometimes but then other times she says the meanest things such as when i have a problem with a boyfriend she points out all the faults and doesnt even blame the boyfriend but while i am dating him she points out his faults. she also blames me whenever i have a argument with a person that is a backstabber and says i am the one in the wrong. another thing she is always threatening to cut her ties with me but when she is around other people she is sweet as pie. i also know she is a very anxious lady and yesterday when she was at home with family and was getting her hair done she said she needed a glass of wine to calm her down. i dont know if its because of the alcohol or if there is more to why she is the way she is. once when i dated a guy who was abusive she said it was mostly my fault because i didnt know when to be quiet. ( i tend to talk alot but thats no reason for abuse)i am curious if its bpd or bp or just an alcoholic
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replied May 11th, 2011
Experienced User
You sound worried about your mom. I wish there were some easy answer to your questions, but there is not.

Only a mental health care professional, usually a psychiatrist, can diagnose someone has having a bipolar or borderline personality disorder. Even then, there is no guarantee of a correct diagnosis so a second opinion is usually warranted.

From what I have read, substance abuse makes it difficult or impossible to diagnose bipolar disorder because it is difficult to differentiate between symptoms caused by the abuse and symptoms that might be caused by a neurological disorder.
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replied May 12th, 2011
Experienced User
oh i see. thanks for the advice. yeah my mom will never go to a mental health doctor because she denies anything is wrong. another thing i notice she one time ordered 3 fried because there were four of us and only 3 of us liked fries and then when she got them she was like hmm there is only 3. when i heard her order 3. she forgot that fast. and also she has always been a worrier and anxious person
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