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Im just so tired of my bipolar wife...come on man!

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November 19th, 2010
Ok, short and sweet and too the point. Ive dealt with bipolar for years. My wife is bipolar and has put me through the RINGER! She stopped paying the mortgage once and we almost lost the house. I found out she has herpes, AFTER we were married one day when I opened the trunk of our car to put the chains on in the snow...and found a bottle of valtrex. She made my son sleep on the board under his mattress and my ex wife called the cops on us. She has ruined every one of my friendships with her outbursts. My friends LITERALLY will not talk to me anymore.And her holier than thou, irresponsible with money ass, has the nerve to call her Dad on me and blame me for our financial troubles. THEN wonders why I lose my temper when she wants me to present my last 3 bank statements,knowing that she has been on maternity leave and not making a red cent. Im tired man, I am so tired of it

DOES ANYONE have any words of encouragement...any reason whatsoever to continue being abused by someone just because they can blame it on a disorder? She is totally F-ing with my head, making me think that her double standards are ok. That maybe I am lower than her. Seriously, I am screwed up right now.
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Dark
replied November 19th, 2010
Experienced User
Pray to GOD allot!i know from experiance HE answers, also make her get help, make her go to see a doctor and get meds, she's a danger to you, your child and herself.

I hope i helped in some way.
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LiftmeUp
replied November 20th, 2010
Experienced User
I agree with Dark 100% pray, God DOES hear you.

I suggest finding your local NAMI (nami.org) and giving them a call. I've had to do the same thing with a family member so know that you're not alone! There is help and there are people you can call.
If your state believes she is a danger to you, your child and/or herself, they will take action.
You're not a bad person and you deserve to be happy. Take care of your child. Is there any where he can stay or someone he can stay with?

Meanwhile, try to stay calm. I know it's so much easier said than done. There's always a reason someone acts out like this. In my situation, it was a control issue. Next time you think you might lose it go for a walk if you can even for a short time to clear your head and just breathe. There are also support groups for family members of loved ones with mental illness.

I really hope you find someone to help you out and keep yourself and your son safe! You're in my thoughts and prayers.
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amberBAMBIstewart
replied November 20th, 2010
if youre being abused by your wife mentally then i think she and you could seek counciling so she realises how shes treating you, and can start treating you better. i also think she should either change medication for her bi polar or start taking some. honestly though, if she doesnt start treating you right i think there is no piont continuing on with this, because nobody deserves to settle for someone who treats them horribly.
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Angela1234
replied November 22nd, 2010
You sound terribly unhappy. this is how im feeling about my former best friend. she has destroyed so many relationships. I think you need to talk to her when she is in a "normal" mood and explain you understand she has a disorder, however you aren't happy and you won't be sticking around forever if she doesnt get more help.
In the end you have to be selfish and think about yourself. If you're not happy, your relationship will surely fail. You deserve the best and to be treated with respect and love.
It sounds like you are really struggling, maybe move on? it will be tough but in the end you will be happier without the torment
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cosmicthing
replied April 17th, 2011
I am bipolar and so is my dad. Dad uses his illness as an excuse to do whatever he wants and excersise no self control. I am very conscious about doing this but I tend to overwork or take up new hobbies and overdo myself in my mania or internalise and withdraw from people in my depression. I recently had an open and frank discussion with my sister and we have come to the conclusion that dad's behaviour has to do with personality, not just bipolar. Some people are more self absorbed and externalise things more than others. Your wife needs to take responsibility and get some help to learn how to deal with her illness instead of using it as an excuse for the hurt caused by her actions.

Good luck. You sound like you have been a very supportive husband, but you aren't the only one who needs to deal with this illness. Your wife needs to work at it too!
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oregonwife
replied February 20th, 2013
OMG, run,run as fast as you can. There is no reason why anyone should abuse you this way. If she didn't have a mental illness everyone would be telling you to get out. Having Bi Polar is no excuse. Leave and cut your loses.
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