I want my old life back

Welcome to the forum skeeter52..Honey I can assure you their are many here that understand what you are saying..here it be by accident,self infliction of pain, caused by another or autoimmune we understnad..

To have a wonderful life then an accident or injury causes that perfect bubble to burst is hard to deal with..

I hope you are talking wiht someone on a regular basis..Talking doesn't seem like much but it does help..It won't change what's happening but it opens you to express more and release some of that tension..

Honey I hope you keep posting and talking we are here.I am on and off throughout the day..

kdlee,
Thank you for the responce. I see a psychotherapist weekly and a psychiatrist every 2 months. It does help but my biggest downfall is my dreams, they won't let me forget my accident and I dream of my family leaving me. amY Family is very devoted to me and I have a wonderful husband but in my dreams its a different story. I hate going to sleep at night. Thank you for listening. Skeeter

http://dreammoods.com/cgibin/dreamdictiona rysearch.pl?method=exact&header=dreams ymbol&search=husband+leaving+me

I found this site it is a Dream site for interpretation..

Anytime you want to talk just PM me..I am online off and on thoruhgout the day and early am..

I am sorry you are having these troubles but glad to hear you are seeing someone to talk with..

I use to have terrible dreams with myneck pain but just realized it hasnt happend in awhile and pain is still there so unsure what that was all about..

ANytime honey I am here..k

I need help. I have not found much comfort in the professionals. The many I have seen have their own ego way of doing things and most of the time conflict with another. I have insomnia but cannot take sleeping pills because they make me feel suicidal. My family hates me and will have nothing to do with me. They are self-centered and independent of me. I am alone. I want to think I have a purpose in life but don't know where to start. I started to go to church and didn't feel like I belonged.

melindamelon, sounds like you need to be seen by a psychiatrist, not only are they good listeners but they can prescribe somrthing to help you over this trying time. Theres a future out their for you, but first look into a psychiatrist and don't give up, keep in touch and God bless you.
skeeter52

Hi honey--skeeter52-that is an awesome post..You are such a blessing yourself..That is a great reply to Melindadamelon..

You know I got to thinking and wondering since the accident have you had follow up MRI's done? I'm just wondering if from the accident or in spite of the accident or not realted to accident if you could have something else going on? You talked of bad dreams,mental and physical changes and depression..


Every since my sister had a brain tumor discovered I can't help but wonder how many times others have same or similar problem and it gets over looked as hers did for far too long..Not saying that is a case but just wonderig if there has been follow up? k

your dreams is probably a fear that you have and nothing more.
i've battled depression for a very long time (over 18 years). and when i spoke to a therapist and took prozac that's when i started getting anxiety attacks when i get really upset. i got off the prozac because i didnt like the side effects, eventhough i know i couldve gotten another kind of antidepressant med.
talking the the therapist helped me a little. what really helps me is witting in my journal about my feelings.
are you taking anything to the depression and the panic attacks?

I have had so many dreams and nightmares since my breakdown last year. I've had some really interesting things happen to me during sleep that I feel is a connection between anxiety and the meds. It's the reocurring dreams that really bother me. I had so many that would just continue each night..some of them really make sense to me now that I am better and understand what was going on with me. Dreams are you subconsious trying to send you a message or acting out a fear.

wendyrs,
I never new how horrifying nightmares can be, I am scared to death to go to sleep at night. I also suffer bad headaches during the night but I just recieved a baclofen pump for my spasticity which the cathedure end is at the back of my neck. My doctor said that it may be osteoarthritis. My psychothearapist and psychiatrist have yet been able to help my nightmares, I am now on minipress to help but I just started it a few weeks ago. Thanks for the input. skeeter52

One thing psychiatrists don't consider before prescribing medication for anxiety or depression is that there can be something medical going on. In my opinion people should get a full physical and bloodwork done before being placed on anti-depressants or anxiety medication. Due to the nightmares and headaches I would tell the doc you want an MRI done of the brain just to make sure there is nothing more serious going on. In many cases there isn't but better safe than sorry. Also, with nightmares and dreams, they are usually trying to tell you something. It's like your body trying to warn you or get you to do something. For example, when I was sick last year I kept having a reocurring nightmare about a baby girl that I was neglecting and then everytime I tried to feed her in my dreams I would be afraid it was too late..At the time I had overdosed and was self-injuring myself, like I said, I had a horrible breakdown. It was my friend who told me that I was the baby in my dream and I was neglecting myself. I cried when she told me that and it really made me stop and think about what I was doing to myself. I stopped hurting my body and the dreams went away. I had some other similar dreams and some were way more frightening, but pay attention to your dreams..Don't be afraid of them, just try to make sense of them.

wendyrs, again I can't have an MRI done due to my neurostimulator implant. I hope that down the road I will be able to sleep peacefully, and without headaches. I'm just a person who has so much going on that I can't concentrate on any one. Thanks for your comments and concerns. skeeter52

I understand. I hope you feel better soon!

skeeter52..Ok--because of the implant xray and MRI's are out..
Could you see a neurosurgeon.. A good one will figure out how to check you out..I can't help but feel that something is causing you to misfire and it's causing these dreams and possibly even adding to the headaches and other pains..
I also wonder about the meds you are on..I was tired out on Neurotin and awoke to nightmarish things..I tried it for 1 week and it was horrible..Any durg that affects the brain can have horrible side affects..If you think meds are a possibility and want me to help you go thoruhg all the sdie affects just PM and I will research..I will be going to bed soon but as always will beback up around 1-4am..k

Thanks for PM..AM glad you are seeing a neuro..am gld he is going through your meds with you and I know this will be hard..You hold on and PM anytime..God Bless..k

Re dreams: I really think people interpret too much into dreams. Your brain is like a computer, it needs to store stuff. it has long and short term memory areas. Dreaming is the brain reorganising the stuff in the areas of memory, its a bit like when you do 'defragment' on your computer. All the bits of info brush up against one another, which is why things in dreams seem sort of real but sort of bizarre. So even though the dreams seem horrible, it's just your brain trying to sort itself out. its a healthy sign that your brain is doing its stuff, in coming to terms with the accident, and putting it in long term memory, where it belongs.

I have dreams about neglecting children too. Especially ones that someone has asked me to look after. Sometimes they starve, or drown! And I have dreams about being chased, hunted or shot. i really dont see these as symbolic, other than in the most general way, ie that my life is a bit out of control / i am feeling fearful. Sometimes I have to congratulate myself on my vivid imagination and wonder why I cant tapp into this in waking life.

one way to avoid nasty dreams is to wake up slowly. Then you are less likely to remember the dream. There is a new kind of alarm clock where a light comes on gradually. This might be worth a try. Or get a family member to rouse you very gradually, eg by opening the curtains and turning music up slowly.

Whatever you do, dont worry about dreams being prophetic. That is just superstition.

From WebMD site states

The subjects of nightmares vary from person to person. There are, though, some common nightmares that many people experience. For example, a lot of adults have nightmares about not being able to run fast enough to escape danger or about falling from a great height. If you've gone through a traumatic event, such as an attack or accident, you may have recurrent nightmares about your horrifying experience.
i'll email you this information.

I agree that for the most part they don't mean anything but in my case that nightmare did mean something. I was going through a traumatic time in my life and it meant a lot to me and really helped me change my way of thinking. I've also had some strange dreams about things before they actually happened. I won't get into that though because it's personal to me and I don't want anyone telling me what should and shouldn't be important to me.