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kcsgirl_101
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Apr 2008 Posts: 22
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I want a baby at 13
Posted: 04-09-08 22:25pm
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i know that i shouldn't be wanting to have
a baby at the age of 13.
i really really want 1 tho.
me and my b.f have been dating for over a
year and i really love him.
i talked to him about it and he says that
he wants 1 too but he's scared that it's
going to ruin our life.
it's not like i want a baby just for the
funn of it
i've raised my brother and sister since i
was 7...litterally.
so i know how hard it is to raise a child.
and i've seen birthing videos to try to
scare myself out of it.
and please dont' assume that this post is
fact.
i've been on one before like this that
everyone assumed it was fake.
if anyone has any advice for me to either
sike myself out of wanting one.
or to give me tips on how to raise a child
if you don't want 2 talk me out of it
they would both be greatly appreciated.
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manuftw82
Supporter
Joined: 02 Dec 2007 Posts: 364 Location: Vestal/LI, NY USA
Thanks: 7
Thanked:3
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Posted: 04-09-08 22:54pm
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PLEASE just wait. Think of everything you
will be doing with your life and how much
easier things will be on you if you wait
to have a baby. I know how you feel trust
me I do. I've ALWAYS wanted to be a mommy
and I remember at 11 I just wanted a baby
so bad. I'm 18 and am still childless by
choice and I am happy about it. I'm in
nursing school and I will receive my
degree in 3 years. It would probably take
me AT LEAST double that time if I had a
kid. Right now you can not provide for a
baby even if you could get a job minimum
wage just does not cover the expenses and
it is not your parents job to support YOUR
kids. Think about everyone else involved,
your family and your bfs. It'd be
terrible to burden your families with
this. If you and your boyfriend truly
love each other and will be together
forever then why can't it wait until you
are mature and old enough to support
yourselves? Go out and have fun! Play
with barbies play video games, do what 13
year olds SHOULD be doing.
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care_free
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Sep 2007 Posts: 384 Location: FL, USA
Thanks: 9
Thanked:75
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Posted: 04-09-08 23:05pm
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Would you want your child getting pregnant
at 13? Knowing that it may kill her or
that people would look down on her for the
rest of her life? Wait 5 years and if you
are still with this guy, THEN try! Right
now you would damage your body so
bad...not to mention the baby could end up
really sick or even die because you are so
young. Your body is still maturing itself.
You can't even get a job to support a
child at 13.
How would you provide healthcare for you
and your infant?
What kind of life could you provide for
your child?
How would you provide for your child when
you are still a child yourself?
What would your parents think?
Would it ruin your relationship with them?
Would you drop out of school?
You can NEVER be sure that the father will
stay with you. More than likely it would
all become too overwhelming for him, and
he'd split, leaving you a single mom.
Taking care of other peoples kids is WAYYY
different than taking care of one 24/7 for
18 years...
Babies are expensive and they aren't
all fun and games. They aren't babies
forever. They grow up then they cost even
more. Do you really want a
toddler/pre-schooler when you are supposed
to be in high school?
Two common problems of babies born to
young teens are premature birth and low
birth weight. These create a many problems
on their own including brain damage,
physical disabilities, etc. The long
hospital stay and health problems for
these babies puts tons of stress on the
teen.
If you were mature enough to have a
baby, you would know you need to wait, and
you'd have the self control to wait.
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Amethyst_Butterfly
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Mar 2008 Posts: 610 Location: UT, US
Thanks: 18
Thanked:39
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Posted: 04-10-08 01:20am
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haven't you posted this exact same thing
before? I mean like word for word? like a
month ago.
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Amethyst_Butterfly
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Mar 2008 Posts: 610 Location: UT, US
Thanks: 18
Thanked:39
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Posted: 04-10-08 01:21am
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i want a baby
Posted: 04-07-08 00:07am
im 13 and me and my b.f have been dating
for a year and 1 month
i love him w/ all my heart
i've raised my 5 yr. old brother and my 6
yr. old sister
i know what it takes 2 raise a child
i have a job and so does my b.f
i want a child
but i just want his child
i would never want another 1.
i've talked 2 him about it and he says he
wants 1 but he doesn't want 2 ruin our
lives
i don't think it will ruin our lives
i've had 2 run my whole household and now
my sis and bro are taken away from me
i live w/ my mom now
i just have a huge urge to have a baby
i do cry bcuz i want 1.
plz don't assume that this is fake bcuz
it's not and i really need help knowing
what i can do
to either stop feeling this way (which i
don't want to)
or help me w// tips 2 raise it and stuff.
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krystineM
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Oct 2007 Posts: 1355 Location: mississauga, ontario Canada
Thanks: 30
Thanked:15
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Re: i want a baby so bad!!!!!!!!!! the only prblm...im 13
Posted: 04-10-08 07:11am
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| kcsgirl_101
wrote: | i know that i shouldn't be
wanting to have a baby at the age of 13.
i really really want 1 tho.
me and my b.f have been dating for over a
year and i really love him.
i talked to him about it and he says that
he wants 1 too but he's scared that it's
going to ruin our life.
it's not like i want a baby just for the
funn of it
i've raised my brother and sister since i
was 7...litterally.
so i know how hard it is to raise a
child.
and i've seen birthing videos to try to
scare myself out of it.
and please dont' assume that this post is
fact.
i've been on one before like this that
everyone assumed it was fake.
if anyone has any advice for me to either
sike myself out of wanting one.
or to give me tips on how to raise a child
if you don't want 2 talk me out of it
they would both be greatly
appreciated. |
Seeing as you were only 7 when you were
"raising" your brother, you do not know
EXACTALY how hard it is. You were a kid.
Your parents were the one raising him not
you, you only THINK you were raising him.
You weren't up at midnight or later
feeding or changing, you were the one
dealing with tempertantrums, or other
things that are stressful, you did not
miss school because of this either.
How in the world would you be able to
raise a child, you an uneducated person,
who has not even made it to high school or
finished it yet, and does not have a job!
Your parents would be the one's raising
your baby, because you are no way near
financially stable.
PLUS, your body is no where fit to have a
baby at your age, you could DIE during
birth, have you took that into account?
How would a 13 yr old CHILD, know what it
takes to raise a child, your just a kid
yourself! There are parents out there
older than you who still worry if their
doing the job right, and stress over not
knowing everything, so how could you know
all this at 13!!??
Get yourself active in something, sports a
hobby, whatever, becuse your bored and
this is whats making you want a baby at
13, you boyfriend and you have dated only
a year, and guess what, he could possibly
leave if you guys have a kid THIS YOUNG!
Take his advice, it would ruin your life
at 13, get involved in something else to
occupy your mind with.
No 13 year old child knows what it takes.
Think about it.
Mention it to your parents or counsellor
at school or something, and see what they
have to say. I dont think your get the
support from anyone at your age, if thats
what your looking for here as well.
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Ingi
Moderator
Joined: 09 Mar 2006 Posts: 8910 Location: Grinning like a Cheshire Cat,
Thanks: 172
Thanked:197
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Posted: 04-10-08 10:24am
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Get a:
puppy
kitten
gerbil
rabbit
ferret
These will actually love you and allow you
to live the life you currently live.
You should tell your mom and dad how you
feel. Tell them you want a baby really
really bad, maybe you can get a new baby
brother or sister to take care of. That
will be JUST like having your own baby,
right?
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krystineM
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Oct 2007 Posts: 1355 Location: mississauga, ontario Canada
Thanks: 30
Thanked:15
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Posted: 04-10-08 12:53pm
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lol why would they have another child for
her to 'take care of'
i think they would most likely discourage
her from acting this way, and get her
involved in something to keep her brain
occupied.
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Saragirl
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Sep 2007 Posts: 41 Location: , Canada
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Posted: 04-10-08 13:29pm
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Hi kcsgirl, I am 20 and have a 4 1/2 month
old daughter who i love very dearly. I was
like you when I was 18. I got pregnant and
had a miscarriage. at that point my bf and
i really wanted a baby, so we tried and
almost 5 months later we got the little
plus sign. so anyways,he had a decent
paying job and a car but we both lived
with our parents so we could save enough
money to buy a house. shortly after Emma
was born he lost his job and its hard for
him to get a new one due to his record. i
love being a mom, but i hate the fact that
we dont have money for our own food and a
house (or even renting a place). we live
off his mom for everything. thankfully we
live in Canada so health care is free and
i breastfeed, but its still very hard.
some days i wish i could just not be a mom
so i could sleep, or shower or hang out
alone for a bit. part of me wishes i would
have waited...not to mention to agonizing
labour i went through omg....it hurt so
badly. i could barely do anything for a
week after i had her . in almost every
case it ruins your body and you cant do
teenage things. just really think about it
please
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kcsgirl_101
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Apr 2008 Posts: 22
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Posted: 04-10-08 13:36pm
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i just got on here on monday so i could've
have posted this before
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kcsgirl_101
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Apr 2008 Posts: 22
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Posted: 04-10-08 13:44pm
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i wasnt up @ midnight taking care of
sister and brother?
i wasn't taking there temperatures?
i didn't feed them and take care of them?
i didn't miss school bcuz of it?
really?
bcuz i destinctly remember all that stuff
happening.
my parents were never there.
they were off getting high in the garage.
trust me i really do know what it takes
i'm not an average 13 year old.
and i have talked 2 ppl about it
u don't know how hard i've tried 2 make
myself not feel this way
i have 3 puppys and a cat
i'm in volleyball, and drama.
and i have thought of all this.
i've read stuff about young people dying
u guys don't understand i've tried to syke
myself out so bad
but nothin works!
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kcsgirl_101
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Apr 2008 Posts: 22
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Ingi
Moderator
Joined: 09 Mar 2006 Posts: 8910 Location: Grinning like a Cheshire Cat,
Thanks: 172
Thanked:197
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Posted: 04-10-08 14:46pm
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| kcsgirl_101
wrote: | i wasnt up @ midnight taking
care of sister and brother?
i wasn't taking there temperatures?
i didn't feed them and take care of them?
i didn't miss school bcuz of it?
really?
bcuz i destinctly remember all that stuff
happening.
my parents were never there.
they were off getting high in the garage.
trust me i really do know what it takes
i'm not an average 13 year old.
and i have talked 2 ppl about it
u don't know how hard i've tried 2 make
myself not feel this way
i have 3 puppys and a cat
i'm in volleyball, and drama.
and i have thought of all this.
i've read stuff about young people dying
u guys don't understand i've tried to syke
myself out so bad
but nothin
works! |
Did you pay for their delivery? Did you
buy their diapers with your own money? Did
you go to work and drive them to daycare
every day? Did you take them to the doctor
and, of course pay for it while wondering
how in the heck you would pay your rent?
You can't even legally work a job yet. You
cannot afford a child.
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kcsgirl_101
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Apr 2008 Posts: 22
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Posted: 04-10-08 15:05pm
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ummmmmmmmm....ok
i do actually have a job
so yea
no i didn't
but i also didn't and never would
go off and waste my money on drugs and
pawn my kids off on my daughter when she
was 7-13.
i think that i'm more ready 4 a kid then
sum who had there kids @ the age of 30.
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Ingi
Moderator
Joined: 09 Mar 2006 Posts: 8910 Location: Grinning like a Cheshire Cat,
Thanks: 172
Thanked:197
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Posted: 04-10-08 15:14pm
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| kcsgirl_101
wrote: | ummmmmmmmm....ok
i do actually have a job
so yea
no i didn't
but i also didn't and never would
go off and waste my money on drugs and
pawn my kids off on my daughter when she
was 7-13.
i think that i'm more ready 4 a kid then
sum who had there kids @ the age of
30. |
You sure are angry. I'm sorry you've had
such a rough time. Please explain how you
would support your child. Obviously your
parents house is no place for a baby!
You'd have to move. Would your BF's mom
let you live there? Does she know you are
trying to have a baby? How will you
continue school?
Where do you work?
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Amethyst_Butterfly
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Mar 2008 Posts: 610 Location: UT, US
Thanks: 18
Thanked:39
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Posted: 04-10-08 15:33pm
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LOL....I can't tell whether this is fake
or there are young children out there who
really feel this way. Dear, you are a
child, go play with dolls or something.
Btw I can also remember getting up myself
when my little sister would have
nightmares, its not called raising them.
Its called looking out for your younger
siblings. Thats what you've done, you've
been a big sister to them. Not a parent.
There is a HUGE difference.
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kcsgirl_101
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Apr 2008 Posts: 22
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Posted: 04-10-08 15:37pm
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it's ok
im sry
my b.f is 14 turning 15 and works on the
farm in the summer
i work at the car wharehouse
i file papers and enter information in the
computer
i would support my child by opeing a
savings account mainly for the baby
i'd put most of the money for the baby and
whenever i needed sumthin i would take
money out of the account
i excpect my parents to kick me out and we
have talked to his dad about it and i can
live there with him
i will continue school by most likely
taking online high school courseswhen i
have the baby
and b4 i'd go to alternative ed.
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kcsgirl_101
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Apr 2008 Posts: 22
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Posted: 04-10-08 15:44pm
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No i have not!!!!!!!
Yea there is a huge difference!!!!!!!!
Everday i would clean the house, wash and
bathe my siblings, cook them dinner, and
breakfast, in the summers lunch 2, walk
them 2 wherever they wanted 2 go, or
wherever they had to go, walk them to
school, make sure they're not going to
school w/ there face dirty and clothes
backwards and hair messed up.
And do u know what my dad and step-mom
did?
Abso-fricken-lutely nothing!!!!!!!
Except drive them 2 the doctors and pay 4
stuff
and even that came out of the child
support that my mom was paying!!!
I think i know what i'm gettin
into!!!!!!!!!
And exactly what century do u live in?
Go play w/ dolls?
How do u excpect that 2 happen?
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manuftw82
Supporter
Joined: 02 Dec 2007 Posts: 364 Location: Vestal/LI, NY USA
Thanks: 7
Thanked:3
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Posted: 04-10-08 15:46pm
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No one said you had to stop feeling that
way. Just don't act on it. I felt that
way too. And like you I was involved in a
lot of things but I never acted on
it..ever.
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kcsgirl_101
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Apr 2008 Posts: 22
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Posted: 04-10-08 15:51pm
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i know
i'm just sick of these ppl sayin tht all i
did was wake up 2 comfort my sister when
she has a nightmare
it ticks me off!
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