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I want a baby at 13

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kcsgirl_101

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I want a baby at 13
Posted: 04-09-08 22:25pm

i know that i shouldn't be wanting to have a baby at the age of 13.
i really really want 1 tho.
me and my b.f have been dating for over a year and i really love him.
i talked to him about it and he says that he wants 1 too but he's scared that it's going to ruin our life.
it's not like i want a baby just for the funn of it
i've raised my brother and sister since i was 7...litterally.
so i know how hard it is to raise a child.
and i've seen birthing videos to try to scare myself out of it.
and please dont' assume that this post is fact.
i've been on one before like this that everyone assumed it was fake.
if anyone has any advice for me to either sike myself out of wanting one.
or to give me tips on how to raise a child if you don't want 2 talk me out of it
they would both be greatly appreciated.
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manuftw82

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Posted: 04-09-08 22:54pm

PLEASE just wait. Think of everything you will be doing with your life and how much easier things will be on you if you wait to have a baby. I know how you feel trust me I do. I've ALWAYS wanted to be a mommy and I remember at 11 I just wanted a baby so bad. I'm 18 and am still childless by choice and I am happy about it. I'm in nursing school and I will receive my degree in 3 years. It would probably take me AT LEAST double that time if I had a kid. Right now you can not provide for a baby even if you could get a job minimum wage just does not cover the expenses and it is not your parents job to support YOUR kids. Think about everyone else involved, your family and your bfs. It'd be terrible to burden your families with this. If you and your boyfriend truly love each other and will be together forever then why can't it wait until you are mature and old enough to support yourselves? Go out and have fun! Play with barbies play video games, do what 13 year olds SHOULD be doing.
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care_free

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Posted: 04-09-08 23:05pm

Would you want your child getting pregnant at 13? Knowing that it may kill her or that people would look down on her for the rest of her life? Wait 5 years and if you are still with this guy, THEN try! Right now you would damage your body so bad...not to mention the baby could end up really sick or even die because you are so young. Your body is still maturing itself. You can't even get a job to support a child at 13.

How would you provide healthcare for you and your infant?
What kind of life could you provide for your child?
How would you provide for your child when you are still a child yourself?
What would your parents think?
Would it ruin your relationship with them?
Would you drop out of school?

You can NEVER be sure that the father will stay with you. More than likely it would all become too overwhelming for him, and he'd split, leaving you a single mom.

Taking care of other peoples kids is WAYYY different than taking care of one 24/7 for 18 years...
Babies are expensive and they aren't all fun and games. They aren't babies forever. They grow up then they cost even more. Do you really want a toddler/pre-schooler when you are supposed to be in high school?
Two common problems of babies born to young teens are premature birth and low birth weight. These create a many problems on their own including brain damage, physical disabilities, etc. The long hospital stay and health problems for these babies puts tons of stress on the teen.

If you were mature enough to have a baby, you would know you need to wait, and you'd have the self control to wait.
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Amethyst_Butterfly

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Posted: 04-10-08 01:20am

haven't you posted this exact same thing before? I mean like word for word? like a month ago.
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Amethyst_Butterfly

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Posted: 04-10-08 01:21am

i want a baby
Posted: 04-07-08 00:07am
im 13 and me and my b.f have been dating for a year and 1 month
i love him w/ all my heart
i've raised my 5 yr. old brother and my 6 yr. old sister
i know what it takes 2 raise a child
i have a job and so does my b.f
i want a child
but i just want his child
i would never want another 1.
i've talked 2 him about it and he says he wants 1 but he doesn't want 2 ruin our lives
i don't think it will ruin our lives
i've had 2 run my whole household and now my sis and bro are taken away from me
i live w/ my mom now
i just have a huge urge to have a baby
i do cry bcuz i want 1.
plz don't assume that this is fake bcuz it's not and i really need help knowing what i can do
to either stop feeling this way (which i don't want to)
or help me w// tips 2 raise it and stuff.
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krystineM

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Re: i want a baby so bad!!!!!!!!!! the only prblm...im 13
Posted: 04-10-08 07:11am

kcsgirl_101 wrote:
i know that i shouldn't be wanting to have a baby at the age of 13.
i really really want 1 tho.
me and my b.f have been dating for over a year and i really love him.
i talked to him about it and he says that he wants 1 too but he's scared that it's going to ruin our life.
it's not like i want a baby just for the funn of it
i've raised my brother and sister since i was 7...litterally.
so i know how hard it is to raise a child.
and i've seen birthing videos to try to scare myself out of it.
and please dont' assume that this post is fact.
i've been on one before like this that everyone assumed it was fake.
if anyone has any advice for me to either sike myself out of wanting one.
or to give me tips on how to raise a child if you don't want 2 talk me out of it
they would both be greatly appreciated.


Seeing as you were only 7 when you were "raising" your brother, you do not know EXACTALY how hard it is. You were a kid. Your parents were the one raising him not you, you only THINK you were raising him. You weren't up at midnight or later feeding or changing, you were the one dealing with tempertantrums, or other things that are stressful, you did not miss school because of this either.
How in the world would you be able to raise a child, you an uneducated person, who has not even made it to high school or finished it yet, and does not have a job! Your parents would be the one's raising your baby, because you are no way near financially stable.
PLUS, your body is no where fit to have a baby at your age, you could DIE during birth, have you took that into account?
How would a 13 yr old CHILD, know what it takes to raise a child, your just a kid yourself! There are parents out there older than you who still worry if their doing the job right, and stress over not knowing everything, so how could you know all this at 13!!??
Get yourself active in something, sports a hobby, whatever, becuse your bored and this is whats making you want a baby at 13, you boyfriend and you have dated only a year, and guess what, he could possibly leave if you guys have a kid THIS YOUNG! Take his advice, it would ruin your life at 13, get involved in something else to occupy your mind with.
No 13 year old child knows what it takes.
Think about it.
Mention it to your parents or counsellor at school or something, and see what they have to say. I dont think your get the support from anyone at your age, if thats what your looking for here as well.
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Ingi

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Posted: 04-10-08 10:24am

Get a:

puppy
kitten
gerbil
rabbit
ferret

These will actually love you and allow you to live the life you currently live.

You should tell your mom and dad how you feel. Tell them you want a baby really really bad, maybe you can get a new baby brother or sister to take care of. That will be JUST like having your own baby, right?
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krystineM

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Posted: 04-10-08 12:53pm

lol why would they have another child for her to 'take care of'
i think they would most likely discourage her from acting this way, and get her involved in something to keep her brain occupied.
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Saragirl

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Posted: 04-10-08 13:29pm

Hi kcsgirl, I am 20 and have a 4 1/2 month old daughter who i love very dearly. I was like you when I was 18. I got pregnant and had a miscarriage. at that point my bf and i really wanted a baby, so we tried and almost 5 months later we got the little plus sign. so anyways,he had a decent paying job and a car but we both lived with our parents so we could save enough money to buy a house. shortly after Emma was born he lost his job and its hard for him to get a new one due to his record. i love being a mom, but i hate the fact that we dont have money for our own food and a house (or even renting a place). we live off his mom for everything. thankfully we live in Canada so health care is free and i breastfeed, but its still very hard. some days i wish i could just not be a mom so i could sleep, or shower or hang out alone for a bit. part of me wishes i would have waited...not to mention to agonizing labour i went through omg....it hurt so badly. i could barely do anything for a week after i had her . in almost every case it ruins your body and you cant do teenage things. just really think about it please
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kcsgirl_101

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Posted: 04-10-08 13:36pm

i just got on here on monday so i could've have posted this before
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kcsgirl_101

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Posted: 04-10-08 13:44pm

i wasnt up @ midnight taking care of sister and brother?
i wasn't taking there temperatures?
i didn't feed them and take care of them?
i didn't miss school bcuz of it?
really?
bcuz i destinctly remember all that stuff happening.
my parents were never there.
they were off getting high in the garage.
trust me i really do know what it takes
i'm not an average 13 year old.
and i have talked 2 ppl about it
u don't know how hard i've tried 2 make myself not feel this way
i have 3 puppys and a cat
i'm in volleyball, and drama.
and i have thought of all this.
i've read stuff about young people dying
u guys don't understand i've tried to syke myself out so bad
but nothin works!
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kcsgirl_101

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Posted: 04-10-08 13:46pm

and my b.f agreed 2 it
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Ingi

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Posted: 04-10-08 14:46pm

kcsgirl_101 wrote:
i wasnt up @ midnight taking care of sister and brother?
i wasn't taking there temperatures?
i didn't feed them and take care of them?
i didn't miss school bcuz of it?
really?
bcuz i destinctly remember all that stuff happening.
my parents were never there.
they were off getting high in the garage.
trust me i really do know what it takes
i'm not an average 13 year old.
and i have talked 2 ppl about it
u don't know how hard i've tried 2 make myself not feel this way
i have 3 puppys and a cat
i'm in volleyball, and drama.
and i have thought of all this.
i've read stuff about young people dying
u guys don't understand i've tried to syke myself out so bad
but nothin works!


Did you pay for their delivery? Did you buy their diapers with your own money? Did you go to work and drive them to daycare every day? Did you take them to the doctor and, of course pay for it while wondering how in the heck you would pay your rent?

You can't even legally work a job yet. You cannot afford a child.
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kcsgirl_101

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Posted: 04-10-08 15:05pm

ummmmmmmmm....ok
i do actually have a job
so yea
no i didn't
but i also didn't and never would
go off and waste my money on drugs and pawn my kids off on my daughter when she was 7-13.
i think that i'm more ready 4 a kid then sum who had there kids @ the age of 30.
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Ingi

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Posted: 04-10-08 15:14pm

kcsgirl_101 wrote:
ummmmmmmmm....ok
i do actually have a job
so yea
no i didn't
but i also didn't and never would
go off and waste my money on drugs and pawn my kids off on my daughter when she was 7-13.
i think that i'm more ready 4 a kid then sum who had there kids @ the age of 30.


You sure are angry. I'm sorry you've had such a rough time. Please explain how you would support your child. Obviously your parents house is no place for a baby! You'd have to move. Would your BF's mom let you live there? Does she know you are trying to have a baby? How will you continue school?

Where do you work?
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Amethyst_Butterfly

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Posted: 04-10-08 15:33pm

LOL....I can't tell whether this is fake or there are young children out there who really feel this way. Dear, you are a child, go play with dolls or something. Btw I can also remember getting up myself when my little sister would have nightmares, its not called raising them. Its called looking out for your younger siblings. Thats what you've done, you've been a big sister to them. Not a parent. There is a HUGE difference.
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kcsgirl_101

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Posted: 04-10-08 15:37pm

it's ok
im sry
my b.f is 14 turning 15 and works on the farm in the summer
i work at the car wharehouse
i file papers and enter information in the computer
i would support my child by opeing a savings account mainly for the baby
i'd put most of the money for the baby and whenever i needed sumthin i would take money out of the account
i excpect my parents to kick me out and we have talked to his dad about it and i can live there with him
i will continue school by most likely taking online high school courseswhen i have the baby
and b4 i'd go to alternative ed.
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kcsgirl_101

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Posted: 04-10-08 15:44pm

No i have not!!!!!!!
Yea there is a huge difference!!!!!!!!
Everday i would clean the house, wash and bathe my siblings, cook them dinner, and breakfast, in the summers lunch 2, walk them 2 wherever they wanted 2 go, or wherever they had to go, walk them to school, make sure they're not going to school w/ there face dirty and clothes backwards and hair messed up.
And do u know what my dad and step-mom did?
Abso-fricken-lutely nothing!!!!!!!
Except drive them 2 the doctors and pay 4 stuff
and even that came out of the child support that my mom was paying!!!
I think i know what i'm gettin into!!!!!!!!!

And exactly what century do u live in?
Go play w/ dolls?
How do u excpect that 2 happen?
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manuftw82

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Posted: 04-10-08 15:46pm

No one said you had to stop feeling that way. Just don't act on it. I felt that way too. And like you I was involved in a lot of things but I never acted on it..ever.
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kcsgirl_101

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Posted: 04-10-08 15:51pm

i know
i'm just sick of these ppl sayin tht all i did was wake up 2 comfort my sister when she has a nightmare
it ticks me off!
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