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I've always dated men..but i like women

I am so confused right now!! I remember being in like 3rd great when i asked my friend out, she is a girl and so am i. So said no and told the teacher. When i talked to my sunday school teacher he said gay people go to hell. So not only did i get rejected by the first person i ever asked out but i was also told i would go to hell if i did.Since then i have only dated guys, but i never really even liked any of them, i just grabbed who i could get i guess.but i did fall in love with my best guy friend. I also used these relationships to have babies. i am now 21 years old and i am a single mom of 2now that i dont want anymore babies i find myself wanting to be with women more and more.i dont know what to do or even wwhat to think at this point..any suggestions?
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replied July 23rd, 2011
Experienced User
Whoa. Okay first of all, you cannot base all of this over something that happened in 3rd grade. You were only what? 7 or 8 years old maybe? That's nowhere near mature enough to be able to know who you're interested in 100 percent. What's important is what you feel now. If you've found that you've fallen in love with guys before, then you are obviously interested in them. However, leading men on and using them to only have children is a no-no. ( Unless they know that you are using them to have children, which sometimes is done) Otherwise, it's wrong to lead people on, regardless of the reason. If you believe you are, in fact, interested in women, you need to let whoever you're with now know that. Let them know you are not into the relationship and GET OUT OF IT. Don't lead anyone on anymore. Also, it sounds like you are only dating guys because to others it might have seemed the norm? It sounds like you were conforming to the norms of society to please others. And one of the cliche norms of society is hetereosexuality. There are some out there that are totally against homosexuality, and a lot of gays don't even discover they are until later because they date someone of the opposite sex ONLY for religious reasons or to please friends or family members. If that's what you are doing, STOP IT. There is nothing wrong with being a lesbian or bisexual. NOTHING AT ALL!! Be your true self. Go after women if that's what you want to do. Only you can label yourself and only you can choose who to date. Don't let the thoughts or actions of others choose your sexuality for you. Hope this helped and I wish you the best of luck.
Lylan
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replied September 14th, 2011
I finally got the courage and told my parents i was in love and wanted to date another woman..we are both very happy and my parents excepted my choice!!
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replied September 14th, 2011
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I'm very happy to hear that Smile I'm glad you had the courage to tell them and of course, that they had nothing against it Smile It's always risky and takes lot of bravery telling anyone that you are homosexual, especially your parents. Im very glad for you and I hope this new relationship you are in works out Smile
Lylan
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