Hi, i just wanted to get some advice! Well right now im 19 in a couple months 20. And it's going to be 10 years my older brother past away. I was 9/10 and that's when all my emotions started. My parents left me with an aunt for about 5/6 months after his dead.when i finally went back to them they never had time for me. they took me out of school to put me in a privet school. i was there monday-friday from 6:30am to 5pm. and a couple months later my mom got pregnant and had difficulty with it and had the baby at 23 weeks.He wasn't safe.But know he is. His really healthy. but know instead of coming home at 5pm i would come home at 11pm cuz i would have to go and wait for my mom to come out of the newborn preemie area, i would have to stay in the visiting area, by myself all the time. My dad had two jobs, and i would see him only about1 hr a week. and im not sure if it's depression or just sentiment. There are nights when i cant sleep at all, i just lay there in bed looking at the ceiling.I feel nervous, I have mood swings,half the day im gloomy and the other half it varies from angry and happy and all other emotions.There are days i sleep all day.other days i dont talk to no one at all, sometimes i just sit there and cry. for no reason whatsoever. Friends and Family dont understand me.They say im too young to have depression.I just want some advice and see if this is depression i have been feeling like this for about 10 years now. and i haven't gone to a doctor. i dont think medicine is such a good idea? is there anyone out there that can be able to help me? or tell me what they think is going on? All is appreciated it thanks!