Hey sobe375
Think of contact with him as a poison, realize that while it may make you feel better momentarily it is ending your life. Escalating abuse, without exception ends in one of two ways. The victim finds the strength to leave or the abuser kills the victim. He could love you very much and mean all of those sweet things he says and in a need to sate his abusive nature, kill you without a second thought. He may feel very badly about it afterwords but you will be no less dead. You have to cease contact with him. If he is making contact with you you must avoid it as if he were doing nothing less than hunting you down to kill you. He calls, change your number. He threatens to come to your home, get a new home. He shows up to your work, file criminal charges. Don't imagine that there is any extreme that is too much to avoid returning to this relationship.
As far as the intense feelings you have for him. Get into therapy sooner than as soon as possible. Contact the doctor you're going to see and find out if there is a support group somewhere that you can attend TONIGHT.
There are a lot of abusive relationships that can be repaired, there are some that can be dealt with leisurely and politely. This man is drugging you to keep control over you and he is burning your skin, both causing pain and marking you. He is way off the deep end of rational behavior. Once an abuser's behavior pushes beyond rational explanation he no longer requires a rationale for his actions.
You need to escape him.